End of the Month Wrap Up

At the beginning of the month, I was amazed that it was 2019. Now, I'm amazed that we're already at the end of the month! I've been slowly trying to get back into the good habits I abandoned during the holiday season for bad habits like junk food. Candy. Cookies. Spending time with the kids and skipping the gym.

I've returned to the gym, or when there is snow, I have the treadmill and yoga on demand. I found a 30 day yoga challenge on Amazon Prime. Sure, it might take me 300 days to finish the 30 day challenge, but I'm still doing it.

Weaning myself off the cookies and candies is also a work in progress.

Then there's also this:

In 2019, I'll be turning 50, so health and aging are suddenly a obsession concern. Osteoporosis and arthritis are common problems for my family. I was visiting Life Away From The Office Chair blog and blogger Lisa suggested taking collagen supplements to not only reverse the effects of aging, but to reduce joint pain and promote bone growth.

Sounded like a great plan to me, so I ordered a jar. While waiting for it to arrive, I checked into the research. It seems to be legit. Which is good. It comes from natural sources. Also good. And those natural sources are ground-up animal bone, hair, teeth, etc.

Not good. I told my husband. He said, "You eat gelatin. What do you think it's made of?"

I suppose...

It finally arrived. I tried to tell my brain not to imagine it was made of ground up bone, fur, teeth and whatnot, but I never made it over the hump. Somehow, the idea of mixing it up and drinking it was  too much.

My husband wasn't so squeamish. He mixed up a glass and gave it a try. He assured me it wasn't too bad-- just don't smell it before drinking, because it had the same smell as when the dentist grinds your teeth to fill a cavity. 

Needless to say, that whole jar is now his. I ordered some collagen in pill form. 

Wish me luck. 

It's the end of the month. Time to reflect on the best of January's entertainment. 

Movies

Spider-man: Into the Spiderverse. Double thumbs up. I'm not usually a big fan of cartoons, but this was a well-written script. The characters were likable. The story was fresh. And the action was balanced with poignant moments and humor. 

Hector and the Search for Happiness. I love Simon Pegg movies. This one didn't let me down. It was funny and thoughtful. I bought a used DVD from a video store. A great way to stock up on movies for a few dollars. 

Television

Brooklyn Nine-Nine. It's back. It has a new home over at NBC, but it's funny as ever. 

Quantum Leap. I bought my husband the full series on DVD for Christmas. We started watching it and I still love it as much as I did in the 90's. 

Books

The Baroness: The Search for Nica, the Rebellious Rothschild. An enjoyable, informative read. From the beginnings of the Rothschild dynasty to the early days of jazz, this book takes an honest look at the humanness of those who live in worlds that seem so much larger than life.

That's it for January. See you in February!

#WeightLoss, take 2019

loved having all the boys home!

I'm at it again. And this is definitely NOT a New Year's Resolution. I don't want to make a cliche resolution to eat better, exercise more, and lose weight. I really want to make a life change. And if I keep trying, it's bound to stick one of these times, right?

I know I can do it. Over the summer, I stayed with my plan for a couple of months and lost 10 lbs. Then life exploded and my healthy eating diary got packed up with the rest of the house, soon followed by the holidays and family. Forget trying to get back to eating healthy with all that activity and stress. And that's why most people decide to wait and make changes when the holidays are over. The New Year is a good time to reset life.

So, here's the Plan that Works! for me:

• Write down all Calories
• Start with a Max of 1500 cal/day, then cut back more
• Fruit and Veggies are "Free" - I don't count those calories to encourage myself to eat more of them
• Drink more Water - I start with 16-20 oz/day and add more
• Creative Exercising - burn calories any way I can!
• Stand more at work
• Take stairs instead of elevators
• Park farther away at the store - especially if I need to shop at several stores: I park in the middle of the lot and walk around
• Master the stairs at home - I do 10 flights up and down when I can.
• Keep the house cleaner, or vacuum more... much as I hate to clean!

I'll post updates soon. And I wish you all luck with your resolutions or aspirations to improve!

Let's make 2019 a prosperous, positive year!

Weighting...

Two weeks ago was my 30th class reunion. Normally, a reunion or special occasion where cameras are going to be everywhere would send my insecurities and desire to crash diet on overdrive. 

But I managed to stay sane this time! The slow and steady, focus on a healthier me approach to weight loss is working. Since I decided to give up the insane notion that there should be an easy solution that didn't require healthier eating and exercise, I've lost 9.5 pounds. That doesn't seem like a whole lot, but considering they were as tough to shake as a clingy toddler, I'm darned proud.

I'll admit, there are times when I'll start to feel like the process should be going faster and should be easier. I mean it's totally unfair how easy they are to add and how hard they are to subtract. Placing the focus on being healthier rather than skinnier helps quite a bit. 

What else helps?

Exercise. I joined a gym with a friend. Going together makes exercise more fun and it's harder to bow out when you have to be accountable to someone else for showing up. I'm not exactly a gym rat or getting totally buff, but regular exercise has helped improve my mood and I snack less. It's amazing how less appealing a chocolatey morsel is once you realize how far you have to walk on a treadmill to burn it off.  

Journaling. Counting calories keeps me mindful of what I eat. It also helps to see the connection between weight losses and gains with different eating habits. 

Eating. Have a bite when you're hungry. Stop when you're full. It seems silly, but nothing brings on binge eating quicker than feeling starved. The same goes for cravings. I had a craving for a Snicker bar. Instead, I had a banana. I still wanted that darned Snicker bar, so I had a yogurt...then a granola bar...maybe a few pretzels. My niece, who is a skinny thing, finally pointed out that I would have been far better off to have eaten a snack-sized candy bar a few hundred calories ago.

Weight for It...

A couple of months ago, I mentioned I wanted to lose weight. I wanted to "obsess smarter" and make healthy changes that would lead to lasting results. Tara was like-minded, so we decided we'd make our goals public and band together to get smart about out weight and our health. Tara checked in last week with her update and some great tips, now it's my turn! 

Since we started, I've lost 6 pounds. That's not exactly an impressive amount of weight to lose in two months, but as a friend said, it's 6 pounds down, not up. So that's a good thing!

After that post, I got wonderful feedback from you guys. Some great ideas I wanted to share.

Sandy suggested buying ready-made rotisserie baked chickens from the grocery store deli for quick snack and meal fixes. My son loved this idea. Ever since I told him, he's been bringing home chickens for himself. Tasty, healthy...total win.

One of my favorite snacks to make with the chicken comes from my sister who told me to use a lettuce leaf as a wrap. Fill the inside with chicken and a bit of low-fat cheese, roll, and eat.

Another quick and tasty recipe, also from Sandy, is chocolate oatmeal. When boiling the cook and serve oats, add a little cocoa powder. This is actually tasty, even without adding sugar, but a bit added wouldn't hurt...unless you want to lose more than a few pounds a month. LOL

Fellow blogger, Jo Wake, was kind enough to share a healthy recipe with us. Jo  posts tasty recipes and life anecdotes on her blog, which you can read here.

Chicken and Broccoli Rice Bowl

Do not cook broccoli too soon, difficult to reheat

3 cups small broccoli florets

1 (8.8-ounce) pouch precooked brown rice (such as Uncle Ben's) I cooked 1/2 cup basmati up for both of us

1 Tbs olive oil

8 oz skinless, boneless chicken breasts, cut into bite-size pieces

1/4 tsp kosher salt

1/4 tsp black pepper

1/2 cup chopped green onions

3 oz light processed cheese (such as Velveeta Light), cut into 1-inch pieces, I used a regular cheese which was spicy.

2 Tbs sliced almonds, toasted

1. Steam broccoli 5 minutes or until crisp-tender.

2. Heat rice according to directions.

3. Heat oil in a large nonstick skillet over medium-high heat. Add chicken; sprinkle with salt and pepper. Cook for 4 minutes or until done, stirring occasionally. Add onions and cheese, stirring until cheese begins to melt. Stir in rice; fold in broccoli. Cook 1 minute or until thoroughly heated. Sprinkle with almonds.

Servings: 3

Nutrition Facts

Serving size: 1/3 of a recipe (1 ounces).

Percent daily values based on the Reference Daily Intake (RDI) for a 2000 calorie diet.

Nutrition information calculated from recipe ingredients. 4 of the recipe's ingredients were not linked. These ingredients are not included in the recipe nutrition data.

Amount Per Serving

Calories 79.89

Calories From Fat (82%) 65.5

% Daily Value

Total Fat 7.58g 12%

Saturated Fat 0.85g 4%

Cholesterol 0mg 0%

Sodium 159.6mg 7%

Potassium 91.14mg 3%

Total Carbohydrates 2.45g <1%

Fiber 1.16g 5%

Sugar 0.67g

Protein 1.59g 3%

Source

Source: Cooking Light

Try, try again

Healthy Lifestyle Update: No comment

I fell off the wagon again, hard. But I’m not giving up.
Some days are too stressful to worry about finding something healthy to eat. Plus, there were donuts at work. I can’t resist free donuts. Poor excuses, I know But I’m weak. I have good days and bad days. So I guess my goal is to have more good than bad, and more good in a row.

I decided I need a solution for this problem if I’m going to be successful - that’s the analytical side coming out. So here’s the contingency plan:

• emergency healthy snacks - baggies of nuts, craisins, trail mix, cheerios - yes, give me some dry cereal! and stash them in my purse. granola bars and nutrigrain bars are good too - just gotta watch the labels, some are more calories than others!
• reach for a water - lots of times I’m not hungry, I just need a pick me up, even a diet soda is better than a cookie or chips
• french fries only once a week - if I have to drive thru (not ready to nix it completely yet, just too convenient) I have to limit the fries, one of my favorite things. At least I always get the kiddie size. Allowing myself fries once a week, I will manage when I can enjoy them - like a reward.

I am proud to say I walked the doggy this week =)
And yesterday, I did a little walk-a-thon for a good cause.
The nicer weather helps!

How you doin??

The best time to start a #diet - part 2

Timing is everything - ain't no joke.
IMHO, I think Spring is a great time to set healthy eating plan goals because:

• No major eating holidays
• Warmer weather is on the way, so you'll want to bare more skin soon
• Better temps also encourage outdoor activities
• The produce section selection starts to improve - more good eats to pick from!

So try on your warm weather clothes - if they don't fit, don't throw a fit! It's time to get fit!

I did all of the above. As I came dangerously close to my weight limit (which is sadly similar to the Debt Ceiling--every time it's close, we raise it a little) Unlike the government, I decided to do something about it.

Phase 1: I started by setting actual hard limits on my snacking and substituted more natural choices.

Results: For the first week, this worked out well. Due to work, family problems, and baseball season, I was forced to make some schedule changes and fell off the wagon which proceeded to run me over a couple of times... Quick drive-thru dinners save lots of time, but are horrible for a good eating plan.

Overall, I lost two pounds. yeah.

I still consider myself in Phase 1 until I master it for three weeks (when it becomes a habit!) But I want to add a little more to it, so I'll call it Phase 1b.

Phase 1b: snack limit & natural choices, plus walk the dog at least once a week.

this is me BEFORE

Sounds easy enough - but with my time constraints, I have to make tough choices. My weight is the least of my problems - until I'm dead! Prevention is a necessary evil that most people don't make time for. But in reality, we're just set in our ways and want to eat and do what we like. Starting kids in a healthy eating pattern when they're young is important.

Unfortunately, the rebellious teenage years usually undoes all the good they learned. But that's another story...

Anyhoo, unless I think of a spectacular idea for a post, I'm going to keep updating you on my progress. Talking about it helps! If you want to join me, please feel free! Misery loves company! But don't expect any pictures - I'm not that brave and I don't have enough confidence in myself to see much of a difference... Argh! I guess losing my negative attitude might help!

Good luck to us!

The Weight Obsession Confession

my friend, Kelli, on the left, me on the right

Side note: I was NOT athletic. I threw shot put.
I didn't qualify for an event ever. You had to
be able to throw the ball a certain number of feet
to qualify and I could never work up enough oomph. 

Tara started the discussion about it with last week's post (read it here) and I'm jumping on her bandwagon because it's a topic I know too well.

The weight-obsession-confession. I admit, I'm guilty. I have spent most of my life worrying about my weight- even when it wasn't a problem. That picture of me on the right? I hated it. My arms were fat, my legs were thick...I looked like a beefalo. Or so I told myself.

Looking back, I'd love to have that body again! What the hell was I thinking? Obviously, I wasn't. I was too obsessed with constant worry to be logical.

This picture was taken my freshman year of high school. At a family reunion that spring, a great-aunt told me she was glad to see I had meat on my bones.

Teen-brain translation...I'm a cow.

After I had my first son, I had an epiphany. My body was more than an image. It created and sustained a life. It was disease free and every part was in reliable working condition.

Some people aren't that blessed, so I decided to stop dogging the blessings and count them instead.

I stopped worrying about weight and the scale stayed steady.

Then life hit me upside the head with a stick. A series of family crises left me off kilter and stressed for time and energy. The abandonment of healthy eating for fast food and easy to grab junk combined with the stress left me feeling double-chinned and miserable.

The obvious solution was to diet, which was the worst choice for me. When I diet, my brain is focused on food and all of the old insecurities come raging back like a beast in search of cookies. I gained more weight.

Add caption

Now, I'm going back to square one. No easy fixes. No quick losses. This is my only body, and I want it to last a while, so I must take care of it.

It's time to readjust my thinking-- again.

How about you? How do you find the healthy balance?

The best time to start a #diet - part 1

You know DIET is a four-letter word.

that's diet, btw

It's so negative. This is what it means to me:

D - Deny
I - Ingesting
E - Every-
T - Thing I like!

I used to try fad diets. Some worked at first. But you know the story - once you see some results, you give yourself a reward. Then something comes up, like a vacation or Thanksgiving or the weekend! and the diet is out the window.

I don't diet anymore. I've been dieting all my life - never satisfied with my weight. Sound familiar? That's a problem in and of itself - a self-esteem problem that is shared by most women. With age, and child-bearing, I grew to accept my form. I maturely realized I wasn't going to exercise my butt off (ha ha). I chose to spend my valuable spare time on things that were most important to me, like family and writing.

I stayed relatively healthy and not too heavy. Then the Change hit. No one said anything about the 25 extra pounds that magically appear!! And in such a short time! I didn't change my eating habits or minimal exercise routine, but BAM! Here I am about to hit my max weight of dire consequences. This is unacceptable and I now have to do something drastic. But I won't call it a diet...

Time to UPGRADE MY LIFE!

I have four constant goals:

But these goals are wishy washy and vague, and easily ignored or appeased. "I drank three cups of coffee - that's mostly water" or "How many raspberries do you think are in a jelly donut? That counts." I groan at my own excuses!

So I am undergoing a lifestyle change. I have to be serious. I also have to be reasonable with the expectations I place on myself. But most of all, I have to have WILL POWER!

At least I'm starting this undertaking at the best time to start a change of eating habits - SPRING!

In Part 2, I'll talk more about my plan and why Spring is the best time to start it. I decided to go for it on Thursday 3/29, so I'll have a 2-week update on my progress as well... Wish me luck!

Do you have a max weight? Do you diet? How do you stay healthy?

Hope you're having a great start to this Stormy Spring!

Maintain, No gain #holiday #diet

December is the most stressful month of the year. What a terrible time to go on a diet!

Sorry, Annalisa - I mean, make a healthier lifestyle change. Which is really what I know I need to do.

We at the RRHA (and on our Facebook page) have a goal this month - to NOT GAIN WEIGHT DURING THE HOLIDAYS!! We aren't even trying to lose, that would be a bonus!

Every year we eat so many yummy extra num nums that are usually only around during the holidays, then we have to make an empty New Year's Resolution to shed the extra pounds.

So here is some advice for Maintaining and Not Gaining, but still being able to experience the Joy of the Season!

• Smaller portions - There are so many delights, you want to try them all. You can with smaller portions.
• Smaller bites - and savor each one, then you're done!
• Share a plate with a friend - you will eat less because there's less AND you don't want to eat more than your friend! And you both usually leave something on it (You can have it. No, you can have it...)
• Bring a healthy dish to the party! - I seek out something healthy to balance out all the yummy bad stuff!
• Stop eating BEFORE you feel full - Hate that bloated feeling! Your eyes are always, always bigger than your stomach. And if you want your stomach to shrink without a medical procedure, you have to train it to be satisfied with less.
• More fruit/veg/protein on the plate than carbs - Remember to have a colorful plate of food, not just a colorful plate your kid made!
• Be aware of calories/carbs - Take a glance at that box of cookies or the ice cream carton before you take a bite. Sometimes sticker shock can help you turn away. Is that goodie worth ALL THOSE CALORIES?
• Park farther away - Shopping is the best form of exercise. Make it count. Especially in a shopping center where you have to visit several stores. Shop til you drop, then hike out to the car and be amazed and feel accomplished at all your steps!
• DIET is a FLW (four letter word) - 
• A diet is a temporary thing. A healthy new lifestyle is what we're aiming for here.
• A diet is usually an extreme change, a shock to the system that the system will resist - these smaller changes can move you toward better eating habits that you can keep and continue to improve upon!
• A diet usually fails - immediate results don't last
• Once the diet is over, you usually crash back to your previous weight.
• Try it, don't diet!

The above helpful healthful hints could carry you into next year, too. Plus with a little more exercise, you could lose pounds and inches that have snuck up on you!

Are you IN? Join us for daily or weekly or whenever we can CHECK-INS on our FACEBOOK PAGE!

Maintain, No Gain Challenge

All right all you really real peeps, it's time to stay just the way you are!

Don't let that holiday spirit equal extra pounds! No one wants to start the new year with a sweatpant wardrobe as your only option.

Not that I have anything against sweatpants, I'm actually wearing a pair as I type this...I'm just saying that as of this moment...I do have other options in my wardrobe. And nooo, I'm not talking about my leggings.

But here's the really real truth, a few extra cookies this holiday season and I'm NOT going to fit into my other pants. Sure, I can up up a size, I know how to shop, but I don't want to.

Now, I could pay big money and join a weight loss club OR I can harass encourage my fellow friends and blog buddies to join me on our Facebook page for the Maintain, No Gain Challenge.

It's NOT a diet. We're turning our Facebook page into a support group that we hope helps us achieve balance--

To indulge without adding more bulge. 

It will be easy- if you're on Facebook. The Really Real Housewives have a public Facebook group, all you have to do is join the group and join in on the fun. We'll start Monday, November 21st- just in time to start the holiday cooking! And we'll be in it together until January 1st.

Keeping the weight off

I’m going to do a brave thing with this post. I’m going to talk about my weight.

I’ve been metabolically challenged since I was about ten. Over the years, I’ve probably done about 80% of all the eating programs out there, with varying degrees of success—usually slow with such plans as Weight Watchers. 

I’ve been quite successful with some programs—How to Lower Your Fat Thermostat (Neuropsychology of Weight Control), South Beach, The Fast Metabolism Diet, and most recently Take Shape for Life.

The odds are not in our favor as far as keeping weight off. I've lost enough weight in big batches to build a large adult male. If I added up all my smaller stints, I'll bet it's equivalent to a small woman.

What makes it come back?

It can be temptations (we eat what we eat because we like the food), or lack of support at home (sabotage by loved ones). Sometimes our bodies even fight us. For example, have you read that New York Times article about the weight regain by The Biggest Loser contestants?

It’s not just discouraging, it’s plain depressing. I have wondered many time why I keep trying. I’m active. I work out. I try to eat right. Why can't I be smaller?

So, I decided to take the plunge and try Take Shape for Life. The thing that encourages me that this time could be THE time is that I have a health coach. She and her husband (a fellow writer), together, lost about 200 pounds on this program, and they’re keeping it off.

The key is the support. I’ve never had much with other programs I’ve tried.

*takes a deep breath*

Last April 20^th, I weighed 241.8 pounds (I’m 5’9”). *cringes* And that's not the most I've ever weighed--that was 249 pounds (without being pregnant). 

As of last Monday, I weighed 191.6. 

**begins rant** Can you believe my stupid body wouldn’t give up that lousy .2 pounds so I could say I’d lost 50!!??! **endrant**

Here’s my before picture next to my current picture.

And believe it or not, I was sucking that gut in on the left.
I wish the one on the right showed my waist (which is smaller than my abdomen--much smaller).

Do I worry that people who know me say are thinking things like:

There goes Donna again. How long will she keep it off this time?

 Heck, I have my own little demon sitting on my shoulder asking me this very question. So, do I fret?

Oh, yeah.

Am I hopeful?

Heck yes! My freaking slip fell off walking to my office last week!

I want good health. I want to be here for my grandkids for a long time. 

Dang it, I’ve got a lot more books to write.

Donna K. Weaver is an award-winning author, wife, mother, grandmother, Harry Potter geek, Army veteran, karate black belt, and online gamer.

Blog | Amazon Author Page | Facebook | Twitter 

 Pinterest | YouTube | Google+

This is Joy

Thank you to everyone who read my previous post, basically introducing my story to you :)

When I talk about happiness, I feel that the description is something felt deep within during moments that are lighthearted and fun. For example, happiness is losing that extra pound, getting that promotion, going on dates, or maybe getting some unexpected income. Life throws us a bone every now and again. It’s good to feel happiness.

But joy… I consider joy to be something that is much more valuable. It’s the quality that I fight for every day. I take comfort in the fact that joy does not require being happy one hundred percent of the time. Just as life throws us a bone, it also gives us challenges we are never ready for. To have something there to help us be happy in those times is what #projectgethappy is about.

After a steady five-pound-a-month weight loss, I stopped losing two months ago. At a standstill, I become frustrated, annoyed, angry even. But combined with all those emotions comes something even better—joy. Because I have been outright with my journey, candid about my weight, I have people to lean on and turn to for encouragement. Also, I’ve learned to lean on myself. Sure, I am at a standstill, but I am beautiful. I am strong. I’m all kinds of wonderful, really ;) These are things I never would’ve thought about myself before.

Joy is something that warms your soul when there is nothing else to keep it brightly lit. Joy is gaining a pound, but knowing how beautiful you still are. Joy is writing 10,000 words that your editor advises that you delete, and you do it knowing it’ll make the story better. Joy is getting fired and having someone to hold you while you worry about how to pay next month’s rent.
Hold onto your joy. It is the key ingredient to any weight loss journey.

Hugs and Love,
Cassie Mae

Cassie Mae is the author of a few hundred… okay, maybe not that many… books. Some of which became popular for their quirky titles, characters, and stories. She likes writing about nerds, geeks, the awkward, the fluffy, the short, the shy, the loud, the fun.

Along with writing, Cassie likes to binge watch Once Upon A Time and The Flash. She can quote Harry Potter lines quick as a whip. And she likes kissing her hubby, but only if his facial hair is trimmed. She also likes cheesecake to a very obsessive degree.

You can stalk, talk, or send pictures of Luke Bryan to her on her Facebook page

This is Happiness

Another wonderful guest is joining us this week - CASSIE MAE! She'll be sharing POSITIVITY with us. We could all use more of that!


I’d like to thank the lovely ladies here for the invitation to crash their party for a few days. When I was asked to talk about my weight loss journey, I was honestly at a loss for words, and I find myself feeling that way again typing this, so I hope that what I really mean to say comes out in a way that makes sense.

2015 was a rough year for me. It wasn’t so much my weight, though that was a contributing factor, as it was the fact that I felt so out of control. I fell into a hole I hadn’t realized I’d been digging for myself over the course of many years. Bad habits, including procrastination, laziness, emotional eating, and poor self-image buried me, and it was around this time last year that I hit rock bottom. And I sat there for many, many months.

I felt my entire world slipping away—relationships I’d established went neglected and uncared for, and the worst of it was that while I worried about it, it was not enough to change it. I holed up, kept my feelings (and lack of feelings) close to the chest, never wanting to admit out loud that I felt dank and dark much of the time. On the outside, I put up a wall, trying to make people laugh and hoping that no one saw through the façade. Those closest to me were not fooled, and it took a long while before I admitted the problem—If I wasn’t toeing the line of depression, I was indeed sunk into its depths.

Admission is the first step to recovery. The moment I confided in someone (my husband), a tiny spark ignited somewhere deep within. Over time, and with open communication, that light expanded. Realization that this was more common than I’d ever thought, an idea formed—In January, I started #projectgethappy, a very open, honest, and public way of my journey to not only lose weight, though that was a big part of it, but to find things that would make me happy again.

What started as a solo project quickly grew, and I could not be more grateful. The people involved have inspired me on my low days, have offered encouragement, and have found a safe place to be honest as well. We’ve found that weight is only a number—one that does not matter, at that. My 300 pounds may be viewed as many different things: unhealthy, ugly, lazy… Or to some who weigh more, it is viewed as goals and smaller sizes. To me? My 300 pounds is strength, beauty, happiness.

Over the course of these posts, I will talk about what is truly important in any sort of journey—not the numbers on the scale or the amount of words written a day (if you’re a writer like me) or the times you’ve been asked for a second date. It all comes down in finding happiness, joy, and strength along the way.

Hugs and Love,
Cassie Mae

Cassie Mae is the author of a few hundred… okay, maybe not that many… books. Some of which became popular for their quirky titles, characters, and stories. She likes writing about nerds, geeks, the awkward, the fluffy, the short, the shy, the loud, the fun.

Along with writing, Cassie likes to binge watch Once Upon A Time and The Flash. She can quote Harry Potter lines quick as a whip. And she likes kissing her hubby, but only if his facial hair is trimmed. She also likes cheesecake to a very obsessive degree.

You can stalk, talk, or send pictures of Luke Bryan to her on her Facebook page

Weight Loss Competitions: Motivation for Healthy Living

Huge thank you to everyone who read my last post, and cheered me on! I’m happy to be back today and talking more about weight loss.

From my heaviest weight ever (at nine months pregnant) I lost a total of 51 lbs, mostly thanks to two separate weight loss competitions. These things are great for jump-starting healthy habits, and even better if you’re competitive like me, and looking to shed a few pounds.

Disclaimer: Losing weight didn’t change how I feel, or my bad relationship with food. I still feel like me, but I also feel better.

How it Works
Participants form a group (both of mine were on Facebook.) Each member pays in cash (I paid $20 for the first, and $10 for the second) And the winners get the payout. I made a total of $100 so not a bad return. There are winners for whoever has the most points (a daily checklist of good habits like drinking water and exercising) and whoever has lost the most percentage wise. I won the percentage both times. I also won on points the first time around, but one person can’t win both categories.

These competitions were inspired by the Lifetime Fitness challenge. If you’d like full details of the competition email me and I’ll send you the everything.

What Worked For Me
Not every body is the same. Not everyone is going to lose weight by keeping all the points. When I began the competition, I was rigid about my points. I’m glad I was, it freed me from my sugar addiction (it took a full three weeks to no longer crave it) and it started me running.

I never in my life thought I would become a runner, but now I can’t live without it. I didn’t feel that way until both competitions were over, a four month span.

It was hard. I didn’t lose very much weight in the beginning. I had to try and follow the book until I could figure out how to break the rules to my advantage. It got me thinking more about what I put in my body.

But here’s the most important thing you have to know before starting one of these: After the first competition, I was mess. I ate everything in sight. I didn’t exercise as much. I gained 8lbs in 4 weeks. The thing was over. I won. So that was that. But it wasn’t. That’s why I did the second competition.

The second time around, instead of being strict about points, I worked on balance. I found a way to not feel like I was starving all the time, and still lose weight. The key was in letting myself live a little on the weekends, then being military strict during the week.

I discovered that when I held back, I actually enjoyed the times I could indulge more. That, was the best gift I could’ve been given.

Come back for my next post where I’ll be talking about everything I ate on my strict days, and share a few recipes!

Jennie Bennett is a hopeless romantic. Thankfully, her husband is willing to be cheesy now and again. It’s probably the reason they have four kids. When she’s not swooning over her favorite romantic television shows (Kdramas) she’s writing love stories. Well, in between changing poopy diapers. Her family currently resides in Houston, TX.

Weight Loss Journey (more like a train wreck!)

I can't tell you how much I appreciate Jennie Bennett's posts this week! She's being brave, telling us about her struggles with weight, which I had no idea she had. She always looks fabulous! It's a very common struggle for so many of us. Thanks, JA.

So happy to be on the Really Real Housewives blog for my first time ever! Thanks for having me ladies. I’m not the type to mess around, so let’s get straight to it, yeah?

In Feb 2015 I found out I was pregnant with my fourth child, and it was freedom.

I had a bad relationship with food for a few months leading up to the pregnancy. Nothing new really, I’d been through periods of starvation-binge-starvation many times before.

Finally, I had an excuse to gain weight, and no one would judge me for it. I’d had three other kids before and never a problem losing the weight afterwards. I should have known from the start that was a dangerous road to go down.

The recommended weight gain for pregnancy is 25-30 lbs. I gained that in the first trimester.  Before anyone starts thinking that weight gain is different for everyone during pregnancy, I agree. However, with my other three children 25-30 lbs was natural. I didn’t have to monitor my diet or exercise, it just was.

Turning 30+ and a 4th child was the recipe for disaster, the weight wouldn’t stop. I knew 198 lbs didn’t seem like the end of the world to everyone, but it did to me. I was only two pounds away from my worst nightmare. I was anxious to have the baby so I wouldn’t have to face that number on the scale.

That’s right, my thinking was so messed up I wanted to have the baby for the sake of my weight. After he was born, I knew it still wouldn’t be easy. I was counting on it. What I didn’t count on was that nagging 30+ age thing.

Some weight came off naturally. About 15 lbs. I had gained 45 when I was pregnant. If I thought the self-loathing and my relationship with food was bad before, it was multiplied by nothing fitting.

30 lbs overweight is nothing to sneeze at, but I had no idea how it would change the way I shopped for clothes. I love shopping, I always have. The shops I loved weren’t made for 30 lbs overweight.

It was Feb 2016, and now none of my clothes fit, and I couldn’t buy the clothing I really liked. I was going to a concert and meeting up with lots of friends, and I really wanted a cute outfit. It took me days and too many hours to count to find something. It shouldn’t be that hard.

After the concert, I decided that was the final straw, and I had to do something to change. I was fortunate enough to find the solution in a weight loss competition, where I lost 51 lbs! Weight loss competitions aren’t the answer, but I think they’ve helped me come closer to finding that answer.  If you want to know more about what they are, come on back for my next post!

Jennie Bennett is a hopeless romantic. Thankfully, her husband is willing to be cheesy now and again. It’s probably the reason they have four kids. When she’s not swooning over her favorite romantic television shows (Kdramas) she’s writing love stories. Well, in between changing poopy diapers. Her family currently resides in Houston, TX.

Diet Is a Four Letter Word

That's me in 1988.

Let me explain a couple things about the picture...

1) The school photographer came and suggested we take action shots. In all my years of  "playing" basketball, this was usually all the action (outside of practice) that I got.
2) For years, I HATED this picture. I didn't hate it because my coach gave me a scowl and a head shake for doing it, but because I was certain I looked fat.

Seriously. I tried to talk my mother into liposuction after getting that picture back. She refused, of course.

While studying to be a mental health counselor in college, I had to write a weight loss program that could be used as group therapy.

I decided I'd make a plan that put self-love first. My weekly group would focus on the whole woman, not just a number on a scale.

Part one was the interest component:

Everyone has a passion...they just need to identify it. My group would require its members to explore interests. I'd bring in people to discuss different hobbies until each person found something that excited her.

Part two was the beauty component:

There would also be a beauty component to the group. I mean, everyone likes to look pretty, right? Wouldn't my weight loss group benefit from beauty tips by bringing in make up specialists, hair dressers, and fashion experts? I thought so.

Part three was the health component:

Lastly, there would be a focus on health. Not weight. Health. I know skinny people who maintain their weight through diet drinks and cigarettes. That's hardly better than being a chunk, right? The group would explore healthy eating and exercise habits. My group would play fun games like badminton or basketball. We'd share recipes that were not only delicious, but healthy. And everyone would be responsible for sharing and coming up with organizing games. That way planning and execution becomes a habit for them too.

So, that, in a nut shell (the original proposal was about twenty pages long) was my plan.

I got a C on it.

My professor's comment on the grading page was, "It sounds like a fun group, but you didn't make a weight loss group".

I took my paper to his office and argued for my plan. I told him I fully believed America's obsession with weight was exactly what was making us fat. If we stopped worrying constantly about what we looked like  and simply started living healthy, full lives, we'd have much better chances of reaching an ideal weight than by spending a whole day counting calories and loathing the bodies we have.

We shouldn't have to wait to be a certain size to enjoy the hell out of life and feel beautiful.

My logic worked a little. I was able to bump my C to a B.

I couldn't get my A because, as he said, I didn't put the focus on weight loss.

It's been twenty years since I lost that argument, but I still think I'm right.

Any time I obsess over my weight, I gain weight. Then I feel awful about myself and beat myself up, and then I gain even more weight. This  summer was one of those times when bad habits returned with a vengeance. I was back to my old obsessed self.

Once again, I am back to trying to re-orient my brain and remind myself that it's not all about weight. It's about living an active, healthy life without the negative self-talk.

Here's a few tips that help me:

1. Add calories rather than subtracting them. Try to eat at least ten servings of fruits and vegetables a day.

2. Hydrate, hydrate, hydrate. The body often confuses thirst for hunger, so we find ourselves nibbling when we really need to be drinking. And a body filled with enough water helps reduce fine lines and wrinkles!

3. Swap food. Where you can, switch from the higher calorie option to the lower calorie. I swapped turkey pepperoni for regular pepperoni and don't miss the original.

4. Keep a food journal. Writing down what I eat helps me make the connection between mindless eating and real hunger. It also helps me keep track of my fruit/veggie/water count.

5. Start counting productive movement. My grandmother baptized her sixth child in a size 8 dress and she never went to the gym a day in her life. What she had was an active to do list. Gardening, cleaning, and walking places instead of driving kept her fit and trim. My grandmother was almost a little over 80 years old when she stopped mowing her own lawn!

Finally, be kind to your body. Like it or not, it's the only one you'll get.

How about you? Any suggestions or tips?