Settling the Great #Baby Debates!

Yes, I'm talking about BABIES this week.

Though I'm far from baby stages with three big teenage boys, (Dear Stork: Please don't deliver any surprises. I don't want to be a granny before my time!) I've been among some friends and family who have precious new little ones. I'm also currently waiting to cover a teacher friend's paternity leave. AND in my next Pop Travel book (CONDUCTION) there are two babies on board!

So I thought I'd share some baby advice and settle a few of the Great Baby Debates...

• To Paci or Not To Paci?
• Let them Cry? or Comfort them back to sleep?
• Crib or Parents' bed?

These topics are big decisions for new parents. After surviving three babies, reading loads of baby books, and having many discussions with relatives and friends, I can sum up the answer in one simple sentence:

It's your choice!

You should raise your child as you see fit. You have to deal with what will work for you and your family. Take all advice with gratitude and a grain of salt--savor it and try what sounds good. Like the advice I'm about to give--When deciding, you have to live with the consequences sooner or later. Crying comes with babies, so it's all how much you and the little ones can take.

• If you want to use a pacifier, go ahead. I did. They're awesome! But get rid of it as soon as possible--the longer you wait, the harder it is. And some say it affects their teeth? Only if you use it too often for too long. Only one of my kids needed braces and it wasn't from the pacifier since he used it the least.
• If you let them cry, have a system, like: increments of time to let them cry before going in to reassure them you're there, longer and longer until they're asleep. This is one of the hardest things I've ever done. But after only a few nights, it helps everyone sleep better in the long run. Be strong! If you give in and rock them to sleep, it will take longer to ween them from it. They have to sleep on their own at some point, it's up to you how and when.
• Cribs are scary for baby and parents. But only at first. The separation gives you both some peace. Again, it is up to you when and how you feel comfortable having baby sleep in their own crib. But if you wait too long, as they get older, they know more and it will be harder to make the transition. This is true for the transition to big kid beds too.

You will know when it's time to do or undo things, you'll sense it. Instinct is real and intuition isn't a joke. Moms have been around forever and raised billions of kids. It's not easy, in fact it's torture at times. We all make mistakes, but we fix them too. In the end, it's all worth it.

Best Advice: Get Off the Phones! They grow up so fast, enjoy every moment!

Got any little ones in your vicinity? What's your baby advice?

Happy "Labor" Day! (ha ha)

10 #Tips for a #HappyLife - Breathe

As I send my first born off to college this Fall, I want to give him a few last pieces of advice, whether he takes it or not... I'll be sharing them with you all over the next ten months in my week here at the House. And I'll gladly take any comments or suggestions you'd like to add!

10 Tips for a Happy Life

10. Breathe. Go ahead and laugh. I did when I heard a friend say this the other day as advice she got from someone to help her with her stress at basketball games. Just saying it to each other helped us laugh some stress away at the horrible calls...

But breathing really is a great way to calm down. If more people took a deep breath before immediately reacting to bad news or someone disagreeing with them, there might be more peace in the world.

Controlled breathing is also a good way to help you get through something intense. Anticipation of a traumatic or important event--like public speaking which I am about to try, ah!--can elevate heart rate and cause anxiety. Taking a few calming breaths beforehand gives you control over your body's reaction and can steady your nerves enough to get you past that first step.

Lastly, steady breathing can help you fall asleep. If you are worried about something and it's causing you to stay awake at night, try concentrating on slow, steady breathing. In addition, imagine each muscle in your body relaxes, starting with your toes and work your way up. You'll feel the tension leave and probably won't reach your waist before you're fast asleep!

Wouldn't the world be a better place if people breathed more? Ha!

Need Better Sleep?

While Tara is busy launching her newest book, Simulation, and I'm busy trying to catch up on the laundry pile, we asked the marvelous Annalisa Crawford to do our work visit! Annalisa is a trainer and physical fitness buff from the United Kingdom. To get her here, all we had to do was float a trail of biscuits (AKA cookies) across the Atlantic. 

Welcome Annalisa!!

How to get a good night’s sleep  by Annalisa Crawford

Hey, it’s Monday. Are you up and raring to go? Or feeling a bit groggy, like you didn’t get quite enough sleep? Did you lie there last night, tossing and turning, getting more and more frustrated? Did you watch the sun rise and realise your quest for sleep was in vain yet again?

Never fear, I’ve got a few tips that might help if you have the odd few days of sleeplessness.

1.       Massage your feet. Find a really thick, aromatic foot balm and spend a few minutes rubbing it in - run your thumbs directly up the middle of your foot, make deep circles just beneath the balls and into the arches, sweep your fingers along your toes and pull. As an added benefit, your feet will be beautifully soft in the morning!

2.       Keep a notebook beside your bed and write your thoughts down. Write down any worries, important to-dos, the name of that actor from that film you were talking about and just remembered. Get it all down, and your mind will be freed up.

3.       Just lie there. Get comfortable—perhaps in a position you wouldn’t normally sleep in—and just enjoy the fact that you are resting and you don’t have a hundred different tasks to complete. Just rest. Allow your mind to wander into daydream territory:

a.       What would you do with a million dollars?

b.       What award are you up on stage receiving?

c.       Imagine you’re lying on a beach, in a mountain cabin, in Paris or Milan or Venice, rather than in your own bed.

4.       Breathe. Properly. A lot of people don’t—we’re shallow-breathers (using only 50% of our lungs) or we manage to bypass our lungs and fill our stomachs with air instead!

a.       First, picture your lungs like the branches of a tree. The trunk (your trachea), the branches, the twigs, the buds.

b.       Breathe in. Focus on getting your breath as far up the tree as possible. When you’ve breathed in a much as you can, pause for a second, then breathe in a little more. Let the breath out very slowly. It takes practise to get enough air to reach the very tips of the ‘branches’, but—hey!—you can’t sleep, you’ve got the time.

c.       Make sure you aren’t breathing into your stomach. If you can see your stomach rising, then you need more focus.

Do you have any tried-and-tested methods? I’d love to hear from you.

Besides being a pro at getting healthy, Annalisa Crawford is a multi-published author of literary fiction and dark, psychological suspense. She lives near the beach in Cornwall, UK with her musician husband, her two boys, and some furry critters. Check out Annalisa's work HERE.