How to Survive Motherhood

I hope you enjoyed peace, quiet, and adoration on Mother's Day!

But Mothers deserve so much more than just one day off - and probably don't even take the whole day off anyway. A Mother's job is 24-7.

Mothers have the biggest hearts, putting up with sass, cleaning up after messy families, cooking for unappreciative diners, and going above and beyond to make sure the family is happy and healthy, no matter the cost to herself.

So how do we do it? How do Mothers survive motherhood?

• Stay positive - a million things may go wrong, but experience tells us everything will work out, and the kids latch on to mom looking on the bright side
• Stay focused - it's easy to get sidetracked with details or things we forgot to get or do on our lengthy chore list. If you prioritize your list, the bigger things will be taken care of, and the rest can be done when there's time (ha ha) or can be moved up in the priority order as needed.
• Stay flexible - surprises and changes come along all the time--class picnic or baseball game rain-outs, sickness, and forgotten lunches or homework. Expect the unexpected and when it happens, it will be easier to deal with.
• Stay calm - Freaking out is contagious. When the kids see their mom is calm in a crazy situation, it helps them calm down too: Mom is a Superhero--she can handle ANYTHING!
• Stay true - Sometimes being a Mom is tough, like when we have to say "No" even when "everyone else is doing it." Stay true to your word, even if you get flack for it, your kids will turn out better and respect you...later!
• Stay fun - Moms are fun too. Be silly, be unpredictable, tell the kids funny stories about your youth, join them in the fort or for a mom and kids slumber party, let them help you bake...there's a time to be serious and there's a time to play. Enjoy it while it lasts!
• Stay yourself - we all make mistakes, but we're all awesome anyway. Admit the first, move on, and shine on. You are their idol for life.

It's all worth it!

Wishing you Flowers and Sunshine after a Fresh Spring Rain!

Happy Mother's Day - A Poem

This Ode to Mothers of teen boys, can also apply to Mothers of all kinds... Here's to YOU!

They think they're funny, not looking at me...

Pledge for Moms of Teenage Boys

by Tara Tyler

Repeat after me...

I am the mother of crass teenage boys.

When they were young, we played with their toys.

Action figures, super heroes, talking turtles, balls;

And I kissed all their boo boos after their falls.

From dare-devil stunts to record breaking goals,

I almost went blind from constant eye rolls.

As older they grew, so did their smells.

The kisses were fewer and so were the tells.

Now they are driving, impressing the girls.

It all went so fast, oh how the time whirls.

Here lies our duty to train these young lives

To be better men for their future wives.

Pledge Number One: Moms must take a stand,

Make them clean up, they should lend a hand.

Stop picking up after them, losing your minds,

Or they'll never get up off their lazy behinds.

Pledge Number Two: Limit their screens.

They must learn to speak, and not just with memes.

Expressing emotions is part of the lesson;

Mimic emojis and less text expression.

Pledge Number Three: Don't let them quit,

Staying with something makes them legit.

Commitment to job, faith, and family stuff;

Sticking with guts no matter how rough.

If we work together on these three big things,

We'll make better men with happy endings.

And don't be afraid, they'll never forget.

They'll always love mom, how e'er old they get.

Remember those boys and their sweet little faces,

And someday with grandkids, maybe they'll grace us.

Now go take it easy - or hide before they find you!

PS - Health-o-Meter: One good week, One bad week

(Teacher Appreciation is chock full of free food!)

10 #Tips for a #HappyLife - Be Thankful

This is what I'm most thankful for...

We all have problems to deal with, no matter where we come from. Concentrating on the things we have to fix, we often forget and take for granted the parts of our lives that are working properly! If we could refocus away from the negative once in a while to be thankful--for what we have, for the positive things, for the things going right--the world would be a brighter place.

Negative nags at our attention. Negative needs us to figure out a solution. Negative needles us to complain and criticize. There's too much negative out there these days.

Stop! Don't let negative consume you. Take a break and think about what you're thankful for. Remember what's good about your life.

It won't make the problems go away, but they will be more manageable with a new, positive outlook.

10 Tips for a Happy Life:

1. Breathe
2. Smile
3. Be Thankful
4. ...

Thanks for listening! Hope you moms had a marvelous Mother's Day!

Tara Tyler - The Lazy Housewife

Hidden Heart #mondaymotivation

Mothers are the toughest people in the world.

We put up with, make the best of, and work with what we have.

Women are the smartest people in the world.

We reason, discuss, and find solutions.

Girls are bravest people in the world.

We aren't afraid to show our emotions and carry on.

Daughters admire, aspire, and attain.

Sisters encourage, enlighten, and edify.

Nieces connect, reflect, and respect.

Aunts know when to pull their hair up and when to let their hair down.

Grandmothers pay attention, work behind the scenes, and take care of every detail.

Together we keep the world turning, 

keep the men yearning, 

and keep the home fires burning.

I'm thankful for all the women in my life.

November was a tumultuous month for me. Severe highs and lows, many tears of sadness and joy, and oh so many wonderful hugs I haven't had in a very long time. I was blessed to be able to spend time with so many of my favorite women and I appreciate them all, especially living in an emotionless house full of boys.

One day as I was leaving my room, I noticed the hidden heart above. It comforted me during one of the bad days I had. It lifted my heavy heart with its levity and my day turned around.

May you find a hidden heart when you need it most!

Self-Care in Chaos

So psyched to have Darci Cole at the House this week! Get ready to let in the light and make some magic!

Hey there Really Real Housewives! I’m excited to be with you today, and I hope I can provide information and entertainment while also being witty and real. That’s the hope, right?

Let me start by telling you a story. Early on in my marriage, my husband once asked me why I looked so cloudy. I didn’t understand, but he explained that my eyes, the energy around me, just felt less-light than it usually did. It was after a few times of this happening that we started to realize I was dealing with small bouts of depression. Sometimes he can see it coming on before I can, and he’s able to step in and help relieve some of the stress forming in my life.

Here’s the thing: all of us have stuff we love, and we tend—hopefully—to let go of the stuff we don’t love. But sometimes, without us even realizing it, those things we love can start to weigh heavily on our lives. Family, friends, even our favorite hobbies, can hang like a cloud over us, making everything else seem darker that it should.

Lately, I learned a trick that I’d like to share with you. When I’m feeling cloudy in any way—be it afraid, or angry, or depressed—I have a thing I do. This exercise helps me to really feel those fears and emotions, let them run their course, and then let them go.

I keep a little black book in my room. Sort of a journal. It’s not kept in any special place, but it stays around. It has a rope on it that I use to tie it shut. When I’m feeling cloudy—especially when my husband isn’t around to talk to—I take this black book and I start writing in it. I write down every negative or fearful thought I have. I keep writing until I can’t think of any more thoughts, and then I tie that book up as tightly as I can, and I put it away.  (I know some people who do this will tear the pages out and either rip or cut them up or throw them in a fireplace. Just some other options so you can find what works for you.)

It’s a terrifying thing to put those thoughts into words, because I know that if anyone else ever read it they would wonder how I could think those things about myself. I know if I ever found out one of my friends thought these things I would want to hug her and bring her brownies and build her a blanket fort. These are the negative thoughts that no one should ever have to have bouncing through their mind.

But it’s something we all do, isn’t it? We are our harshest critics, especially as wives and mothers. We feel this weird obligation to be perfect even when the people around us are completely understanding of the fact that we’re not. This is just one method I’ve found that works for me, but there are so many ways we can fight the urge to run ourselves ragged. Forcing ourselves to take a break, making a list and focusing on one thing at a time, really cherishing the small moments of peace and love that come to us.

It’s difficult, being a wife and/or mother. Life is crazy and fun and stressful and rarely easy. But the good news is that we’re not alone. So many of us go through this, and we can rely on each other for help. Life is hard, but you can do it, and you’ll be fantastic.

Darci Cole writes fantasy novels for YA/MG readers, and is currently seeking representation for her work. She is a Gryffindor, a fangirl of many fandoms, and a wandmaker for Colevanders. She loves Dr Pepper, pepperoni-pineapple pizza, and stars.

Follow her on: Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, Instagram

Where does the time go?

We are spiced to have the lovely, long-standing Leigh Covington as our guest this week! She going to lay some tips and advice and fun stuff down and pump us up!

How many times do you wish for more hours in a day? I think we all do! We have to run kids to soccer games and piano lessons while working on laundry, cooking dinner, and attempting to fit in our 10K steps for the day. This is also hindered by our attempt to make ourselves presentable if we leave the house or if someone stops by for a visit, let alone having our kids dressed and ready to take on the world.

I used to think that things would get easier as my kids got older and they could do more for themselves, but that's not true. Life stays just as busy and hard - just in different ways. Life is simply hectic! And while we're all wishing there was more time to get ALL of these things done and working ourselves into the ground day and night so that we can scratch things off our "to-do" list...

Are we making time where it REALLY matters?

Yes... I'm sure you know where I'm going with this... are we making time to be together? QUALITY time - not simply time when we are all in the same house on our various electronics working toward different goals. Unfortunately, that doesn't count.

While there are a million ways to make time for our littles, I'm going to take you all along on my family's camping adventure from a couple of weeks ago.

First, let me explain that I've spent the past 2 1/2 years finishing my teaching degree which has left me lacking in the T.I.M.E. department. Feeling like an epic failure, I decided we needed to get away from our regularly scheduled program and enjoy some quality time. This included me packing up my three kiddos (on my own, since the hubby had to work) driving them two hours away from home, into the mountains to attempt a camping and fishing experience. What happened?

1. No cell phone service! We had to be creative and be together!
2. We had to work toward similar goals. We could set up the tent together, unload the car together, cook meals together, & figure out how to untangle fishing line together!
3. When we all froze at night because I didn't bring enough blankets - we could snuggle together!
4. Talking, laughter, and spending TIME with each other. 

It's probably quite obvious that you don't have to go to the mountains to do any of this. That was just something I have wanted to do with my kids for awhile, but it worked and it was worth it! Taking time for one another - playing together and finding a sense of unity, is all worth it. While, I'd love it if that meant there was no arguing, that wasn't really the case. Lets face it - we are human, but the arguing was happening less and fun was happening more. Hallelujah!

How else can make time for each other?

• Eat dinner together - don't forget to talk in between mouthfuls!
• Read a book to one or all of your children.
• NO TECH TIME - make time to talk and play. Ask your kids about their day.
• Play games together. My kids are card sharks so we love card games at our house.
• Cook something together, or teach them how to cook.
• Work together.
• PUZZLES! (A new favorite for us!)
• Go on a walk, ride bikes, go swimming, etc.

Truth be told- spending time together helps our kids, and even our spouse, know that we genuinely care about them and what is going on in their life. It helps build confidence and security in who they are and what they are capable of. Don't we all feel more empowered when we feel loved and accepted? Doesn't someone taking TIME for us help build those feelings of love and security? The love and support of family will probably reach much further than we can ever truly know.

For me, time with my kids and husband is this important so I put it at the top of my priority list. Oh well if I'm behind on laundry. Oh well if I'm the weirdo who bakes 5 dozen cookies with her kids to take around for Christmas gifts. That's okay. Despite how we might feel sometimes --- being a mom is the best job in the world, and definitely the most important. Does that mean that everything else we do isn't important too? Nope! Not at all. It simply means that you shouldn't downplay your role as "mother." Embrace it! And make time to embrace the time you have with those you love.

So, how do you make TIME for your family? What does your family love to do together? I look forward to hearing your ideas. I'm always looking for new things to try.

Leigh Covington is the mother of three active children and a full time student at Grand Canyon University, finishing her Bachelors in Secondary Education emphasis in English. Fueled by Coca-Cola, she spends the majority of her time watching soccer games or gymnastics lessons, while sneaking in a sweet treat to satisfy her chocolate addiction. She also teaches the youth at church and loves spending time reading a good book whenever she can find a free minute.

I hate making dinner

There, I said it. Does anyone else relate? I always feel bad about not enjoying to cook. My mom likes to cook, my sister likes to cook, lots of my friends like to cook, and apparently lots of people on Facebook either like to cook or just like watching someone else cook... Well, I appreciate all these people - and I love to eat good cooking! I just don't like to do it myself.

I'm going to be that grandma from Sixteen Candles, W/O the cigarette!

Here are my
Top Ten Reasons for Detesting Dealing with Dinner...

1. The daily question, "What's for dinner?" with answer followed by a groan.
2. The prep work - chopping, shredding, slicing, peeling, etc
3. The recipe times for prep work are usually underestimated
4. The splatter! I have an apron, but when I forget it, I inevitably stain one of my favorite shirts.
5. The smell - great during, but it sticks with you for hours after and isn't as appetizing...
6. Time to make = 30-40 min, Time to eat = 5-10 min, Time to clean up = 30-40 min
7. At least one person has a complaint or suggestion on how to do it better
8. The other annoying question, "Why can't we eat out?"
9. No help, unless threatened at gun point to take away video game time
10. Sometimes it's just not worth it.

Does anyone relate? It can be tough, but we still have to do it. So, being a problem-solver, here are some 

Ways to Take the Agony out of Dinner:

• Turn on some tunes or put on a show
• Pre-cooked and pre-chopped ingredients
• Easier substitutions
• Add-ins for personalization and picky palettes
• It's healthier with fresh fruits and veggies we don't usually get eating out.
• As the kids get older, they actually do appreciate more, try more foods, and help more.
• Mostly, it reminds me of my mom and all the wonderful things she did for my sis and me growing up. She's the best!

Happy Mother's Day! (I know it's not May yet, but we deserve more than ONE DAY a YEAR!)