"Supper" Heroes of the Kitchen

It's 2:13 PM on Sunday as I'm finally sitting down to write this and I'm pretty well beat; I've been in the kitchen since around 10:30 this morning doing meal prep for the week. My feet are screaming at me, but I don't feel bad for ignoring their whining considering I've now got 12 meals in the fridge ready for grab-n-go this week.

I'm going to pat myself on the back for a moment - I'm still *mostly* sticking to the diet  healthy way of eating (WOE) we started at the beginning of the year (it's pretty much halfway between paleo and Mediterranean), and trying to stick to that WOE has drastically changed the staples that I used to keep in the kitchen for quick meals. The hardest change was slowly emptying out our cheese drawer and ditching the assorted pre-sliced cheeses. I might have cried a little, but the occasion Babybel gouda mini-wheels have kept me from going on a dairy-deprived rampage. If you haven't had these, you're missing out on little pieces of heaven.

Other changes haven't been nearly so hard:

• I've swapped pastas for zucchini and eggplant (the spiralizer comes next week!).
• Red cabbage slices make shockingly delicious salsa scoops with the right amount of crunch.
• Marinated cucumbers are seriously good on everything. EVERYTHING.
• So is sliced/shredded turkey breast. Getting whole smoked breasts (1-3 lbs) on sale then slicing/vacuum bagging/freezing at home has given us a great source of fast protein that goes in everything from salads to wraps to stews and saved a bunch of money in the process (suck it, Geico.)

And last but not least:

• My favorite hero to replace sugar/sweet sauces in entrees: frozen no-sugar added orange juice concentrate (FoC from here on out). Buy this. Keep this in your freezer. It's a game changer for flavor AND it cuts out refined sugars in favor of natural sugars.

I can't tell you how many times I've pulled out the FoC when recipes called for either sugar or something else syrupy, and it ALWAYS tastes better. It also adds a major flavor boost when you need a little zing. Here are just a few of the ways I've used it:

• Homemade vinaigrette recipe calls for half a cup of sugar? Ditch it. Use a single tbs of sugar and add two tbs of FoC instead. 
• Citrus chicken/pork marinade - 1 cup plain greek yogurt plus 1/4 cup FoC. Throw in curry/coriander to taste.
• Hawaiian Ham glaze - Ditch the brown sugar! Thaw 1/2 cup of FoC with pineapple (still no-sugar added) and simmer with 1/2 cup of honey on the stove top until it has an even texture, then you're ready to glaze the ham! Note - I like to spear the ham with pineapple chunks when I make this recipe.
• Zesty sandwich dressing - 1 tsp of natural mayo blended with 1 tbs of FoC. Great on turkey or ham sandwiches.
• Quick-pickled red cabbage - add 1 tbs FoC to 1 cup vinegar (I prefer white wine vingar), pour over finely-chopped raw cabbage until covered, and keep in the fridge for great salad, wrap, hot dog, or burger toppings. 

Honestly, if sweet is what you're craving and you can imagine citrus going well with it, this is a really fantastic way to soothe that sweet tooth without blowing up your refined sugar count for the day on your calorie tracker. You even get a great dose of vitamin C while you're at it. So, basically, it's totally here to save the day... from the flu.

Now it's question time! I've let you in on my favorite "supper" hero secret. What are you favorite healthy trade-offs?

Life Beyond the Glare

My husband and I recently sold our house and moved into an apartment which includes a cable television package with the rent.

This, for me, was a very big deal.

I'm one of the zillions in the world with a very addictive personality when it comes to passive entertainment. So much so that it majorly got in the way of accomplishing my goals. So in spring of 2006, with no small amount of self-righteousness, I cut the cord.

And it was glorious. I left the house. I talked to people again. I made phone calls to family members. I read like crazy, learned to transliterate Cyrillic, and - most importantly - wrote several books. Now that we have cable back after a full decade without, I'm dealing with some pretty mixed feelings. I mean, this isn't Netflix we're talking about. This is real TV.

That blasted TV, that beacon of passive entertainment, was always the siren to my Argo. It didn't matter what was on - if it was a hemorrhoid commercial you'd still find me sitting in front of the flickering glare completely mesmerized for the 15 seconds until something else came on. My hobbies suffered, my social life (such as it was) suffered, and my house cleaning habits were non-existent. Who can think about spring cleaning when "Supernatural" re-runs are on???

So now that we have cable - my old arch-nemesis - again, I've had to learn how to protect myself from accidentally getting caught in a channel-flipping loop so I can live a full life beyond the glare. Especially considering I've got a book due this spring! Here's what I've done so far:

1. Figure out what shows I'd like to see, and DVR them. 
2. Only watch them via DVR and ONLY when I'm already caught up for the day.
3. Never turn on live TV. I did make exceptions for the debates, though a large part of me wishes I hadn't.
4. Prioritize show-watching by how quickly they're likely to be spoiled by Facebook trolls. By this reasoning, we always watch "Game of Thrones" and "Walking Dead" before getting around to "Big Bang Theory."
5. No turning on the TV for "background noise" while cleaning. You know what happens if you do that - you'll end up immobile the couch with a rag and polish in your hand watching crime drama re-runs before you know it.

Now I'd like to hear YOUR methods for keeping TV from taking control of your household. What are the boob tube rules at your house?

BLING YOUR THING: Being You and Proud

This week we are Proud as Provolone & Parmesan as we welcome the Cheesy Queen CRYSTAL COLLIER to the House!

It's National Wear Something Gaudy day! (Do it!) 

What will I be wearing? Something like this:

Source

Cheese makes me happy. It's my THING. 

You have a thing too, so what is it? What makes you happy just thinking about it? What brings you fulfillment or sets you apart?

In the marketing world, we're told to brand ourselves so we stand out. (That was never my intention, btw, I just love cheese.) I think in life we do the same thing. When we're young, we search for what it is we love. Sometimes that shuffles us into categories or cliques. The older we get, the more that thing begins to define us, to shape us--not because we relinquish control, but because we build our lives to encompass it. (I'm not talking about sociopolitical issues.)

My other thing looks something like this:

I haul 4 kids around with me everywhere. Each individual personality teaches me so much, and they've completely changed my outlook on life. They also challenge me well beyond where I thought my sanity line stood. Each one provides me the opportunity to be fulfilled through service to them, AND each is growing my capacity. (That shaping thing really comes into play.)

However, it seems like the predominant mentality these days is for people to look down their noses at large families--like the parents couldn't figure out birth control or are single handedly trying to bankrupt the country. (Because those kids will have to end up in poverty due to neglect or something, right?)

I have news for those people. SOME OF US LIKE BIG FAMILIES--and man do they keep things interesting.

But they're not for everyone. Obviously. ; )

So here's your permission today. Love your thing. Let it define you. Don't apologize for it or diminish it because your neighbor feels differently. Bling proudly.

Are you blinging your thing? What bling would you be wearing today if you could express yourself on your sleeve?

Crystal Collier is a cheese-loving blogger & author who pens out funnies, deep thoughts, and book giveaways. She's the author of the Maiden of Time series, a 2012 winner of PitchWars, and a 2016 IWSG writing contest winner. She has lived from coast to coast and now calls Florida home with her creative husband, four littles, and “friend” (a.k.a. the zombie locked in her closet). Secretly, she dreams of world domination and a bottomless supply of cheese.

The third book in her Maiden of Time series releases November 1, 2016. Find her and her books online.

Happy - Argh - Pirate - Argh - Monday - Argh!

The Really Real Housewives are proud to present DONNA K WEAVER as our guest this week! And starting on her birthday, no less!

Today is my birthday! I’m too old to take pleasure anymore in the increasing numbers, but I do have a couple of things I like to celebrate.

First

It’s Hermione Granger’s birthday too (if she’d really been born).  *shouts*

Happy Birthday, Hermione!

   

Second

It’s International Talk like a Pirate Day. 

This is a day of awesomeness. Did you know:

• If you live near a Krispy Kreme, you can get a free donut by talking like a pirate today and a DOZEN donuts by dressing up like one when you come.
• Facebook has a language option of Pirate (It’s actually called English, Pirate), so all your headings are in pirate. (Click here for instructions)

Here's what my header looks like in Pirate.

• Google also has a search page just for Pirate talk. Click here.
• There are language translators to help you if your pirate speech doesn’t flow easily. Here are a couple to try:

SpeakPirate

Syddware

To conclude, enjoy this humorous “how to video” on celebrating the day.

Donna K. Weaver is an award-winning author, wife, mother, grandmother, Harry Potter geek, Army veteran, karate black belt, and online gamer.

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Cat Pee Patrol

If any of you follow me on Facebook or Instagram, you know I love the crap out of my cat, Princess Lily Leaf Butt. She's the last of the 4 cats I had when I met my husband (we lost 3 to cancer over the course of 4 years), and she is spoiled beyond reasoning. She dines on venison and braised bunny because of her protein sensitivity (thank god for Hollywood Feed!), and she gets treats as soon as we get out of bed, and as soon as we get home from work. She even has her own little screened-in patio with flowers and a litter box that gets cleaned regularly by her human.

And yet, in that amazing ability all felines share to display positively unrestrained disdain, she still punishes us by going to the bathroom on anything soft we leave out for her.

She's even the reason we can no longer leave a bathmat out because - and trust me on this - there's nothing worse than stepping out of a shower onto a mat that steams and goes mush.

Peeing outside of the box is one of the major reasons people list as returning otherwise perfectly adoptable cats to shelters, too often leading to would-be companion animals eventually being lost to kill shelters. Granted, it takes a special person to handle delving into a cat's twisted psyche to diagnose the root of the problem, but since we're already used to her particular brand of adorable evil we decided to follow a few steps to suss out the problem.

1. First and foremost, make sure the box is clean. Cats are fastidious little devils and they like their throne to reflect the grandeur they feel they deserve. Some cats are less forgiving than others and may need a box cleaned thoroughly every day, not just scooped. 
2. If your box is clean and your cat is peeing somewhere it's not supposed to, take it to the vet as soon as possible. Urinary Tract Infections are extremely common and are frequent causes of potty issues in pets. Ear infections, pests, worms, and other ailments that cause your cat discomfort and may not be easy to see can also be the culprit. 
3. If your cat has a clean bill of health, make sure the litter box is in a "safe" location. Even if it's perfectly clean, your cat may not feel comfortable if the box is near a source of loud or sudden noises, or in a high-traffic area. It may even be in view of a window where other animals pass by, making your cat feel threatened during its daily constitutional. Try moving the box to quieter locations or even adding a second box somewhere else in the house. 

   

   One cushion is never enough for Princess Lily Leaf Butt

4. Is your cat peeing on YOUR clothing/bedding? People tend to believe that all cat urination outside the box is territorial (esp when it belongs to them), but more often than not it's because they associate that smell with you and it makes them feel safe. This goes back to #3. If they're seeking a safe place to go to the bathroom, then you might need to move their box.
5. If your cat pees on your jerk boyfriends shoes - you know, the one who doesn't like cats - well, then, your choices are clear. Dump the guy. Cats are smart.
6. Wherever your cat has peed (or if another pet has ever peed in a location), be sure to thoroughly clean the area. If it's on carpet, use white vinegar and let it soak all the way through to the pad, then blot the area after at least 10 minutes. I usually repeat this at least twice to make sure the smell is totally gone. If a cat smells pee anywhere in the house, it will seek it out as a place in the future.  That's why we have one room in the house where the cat can only hang out under supervision. And why I moved a heavy tool box into a weird spot in the floor...

Finally - remember that cats don't understand discipline or shaming the way a dog does. If you yell at a cat or try to punish it, you'll only scare the animal and probably drive it to more inappropriate peeing out of fear. #3 has ended up being the brunt of the problem in our house. She went from having a back yard full of prime poop spots to having only a single box. Hence the little "gifts" she started leaving throughout the house.

If your cat has you at your wits end on pee patrol, try going through these steps before doing anything drastic and you might end up with the relationship that every Fancy Feast commercial promises us cat ladies.

Anyone else have any tips to share?

#MondayMotivation - Find Your Happy!

We have a special treat this week - our guest is Jolene Perry, long time blog friend and multi-talented mom. She has some great advice to share with us this week... Take it away, Jolene!

First off, I’m soooo super stoked to take over this week *happy dance*
I’m gonna keep it simple today, and roll with a list. Becuase I like lists. They make me happy :-)

A RANDOM LIST OF THINGS THAT HAS MADE MY LIFE SO MUCH HAPPIER

#1 You are the boss of you. Don’t let someone tell you that you’re doing something wrong, if you’re happy, you’re doin’ it right. I add, tweak, and change bits of exercies, recipes, rules...

This one comes with a story - I gained a LOT of weight with my son. I threw up for all nine months, and the only way to not throw up and stay off of liquid IVs, was to be STILL. When I was still, I didn’t throw up as often.  ANYWAY. Nothing fit after he was born, of course, and so I told myself that I’d be allowed to get new clothes after I lost the weight. That was such a huge mistake. There is exactly zero motivation to lose weight when all you have are clothes you don’t like and don’t feel pretty in. Once I finally bought a few things that made me feel pretty, I found the motivation to get up and move again. #2 DO NOT WAIT UNTIL XXX BEFORE YOU DO SOMETHING NICE FOR YOURSELF.

Along with #2, #3 Don’t save your bigger clothes, just in case. Guess what? You’ll end up filling them again. And while we sometimes do gain weight back, don’t be prepared for it.

Because I live in Alaska, and we end up in the dark for so many months out of the year, I’m always looking for little tricks to make me feel happy when the world feels as if it’s trying to suffocate me. For me, that happy place is sometimes clothes, so just bear with me for a sec. Trade out your favorite hoodie with a killer cardigan. Trade out your worn running shoes for something with a teeny bit of style. #4 Just break outside of your norm dressing once in a while. Which goes with...

#5 Dress up to run errands once in a while. You know that skirt that makes you feel all sassy? Or those boots that make you feel like you could fight zombies? Or that blouse that makes you feel like Taylor Swift? (or something else that’s all yours). Just WEAR IT once in a while. You don’t need a purpose or a reason to dress up if you want to.

We need people. #6 FIND YOUR PEOPLE. Does this mean you have to put yourself out there? Yup. Is that terrifying? Definitely can be. Is it worth it? SO VERY WORTH IT. If you’re a knitter, there are a ton of knitters out there. Yoga your thing? SO many yoga groups. Sewing? Writing? Journaling? Genealogy? THERE ARE PEOPLE OUT THERE FOR YOU. Local people. That you can meet with face to face. Find your people.

#7 Timers work wonders! I’m a weirdo about timers, but there’s a reason. A good friend of mine came to visit, and she was in the middle of setting timers for everything. I rolled my eyes, but we decided that we’d give ourselves 10 minutes to clean up my house. We seriously cleaned the main part of my tiny house in 10 minutes. Because we knew our time was limited, and because we knew we could just walk away when we finished, we hustled. I use timers for writing, and often, I still use timers for cleaning. Even when I’m miserably tired, I can usually manage 5 minutes. You’ll be amazed at how much you get done.

So many people don’t like this bit of advice, but I turn 40 this September, so I’m gonna give it to you anyway. #8 MOVE YOUR BODY. Yup. Exercise. BUT, do it your way. I used to do these really killer hard workouts. I was all about P90X, or Jillian Michaels or CrossFit. Some days I’d work out 3 times a day. At a certain point, I realized I wasn’t loving working out. Now I walk and I do yoga. And guess what? My body is stronger, and I’m happier than I’ve ever been. TRY a few things. If you’re happy, don’t be afraid of the rut. If you’re bored, try something new (and don’t be afraid to change it up for you).

Always remember that change can be a good thing.

#9 DON’T BE AFRAID TO BE WEIRD! I have people tell me ALL the time - I could never pull off those shoes, or I could never wear that haircut the way she does, or that outfit is too cool for me. STOP IT! If you love a haircut? DO IT! OWN IT! LOVE IT! And then someone else will look at you and say, I wish I could pull that off.

#10 TAKE TIME FOR YOURSELF doing something you love. No mother or wife, or any person should feel guilty about taking time for herself, to do what she loves. I need my children to follow their passions, and I’d love for them to have less guilt about doing that than I sometimes do. It is important for your family to see you as a human, and not only MOM. Hey, don’t take that the wrong way - moms rock, we’re amazing, but we have things outside of being a mom that need to be part of our lives, for us, and for our family.

AND, that’s what I have today. Am I perfect? Nope. Do I take my own advice? Most of the time!! Can’t wait to see you all again Wednesday!!

Jolene Perry writes books for teens and lives in Alaska with her family, dog, cat, and tortoise.

I Tweet   I Facebook   I have an author Site   I Tumblr like a gymnast

Essential Oils for soothing start to your week!

This week we have a fabulous guest. Jessie Andersen is a fellow housewife with a special talent for sniffing out the right essential oil for whatever ails you! Take it away, Jessie!


I’m so excited to be a part of the REALLY Real Housewives blog this week. My life is filled with being a mom, writing, and a small essential oil business. I thought I’d mix them up this week and share some of my favorite activities to do with oils.

If you have never heard of essential oils, they are plant oils used for all sorts of health purposes. Today I’m going to highlight a few oils that are essential for any mom’s “awesome mommy” repertoire. Keeping my family healthy is one of my main focuses. I do this with essential oils.

Let’s start with Peppermint:
This is one of my all-time favorites. I use this to ease the occasional headache or stomach upset. *

Lavender is another must have especially for kids. We use it for its calming benefits and to promote a restful night’s sleep.

We also use it for skin health, including soothing skin irritations. And when I’ve sat in front of the computer too long and my muscles are all tense… lavender does the trick to ease that tension. *

If I had to choose one oil above all else, it would be Melaleuca. Known for its antiviral properties, it’s a must-have to promote healthy immune function. I also use it for healthy skin.

Since I’m a writer, I have one more favorite: The focus blend. It enhances and sustains focus, which is a must when writing with a two-legged distraction constantly chattering in my ear.






*These statements have not been evaluated by the Federal Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent disease.


I could go on and on about oils and what they’ve done for my family, but that would take way too long! So, I’ll leave you with this: If you have never tried a form of alternative medicine, step out of the box and give it a shot. I never thought I’d be an “Oil freak” but now, they are our first go-to. You might find they work well for you too. You can find them at www.mydoterra.com/jessieandersen

There’s not much to do growing up in a small town in Western, NY, so J. Andersen wrote stories and won high school writing contests. But in college her writing was limited to term papers. While teaching middle school she began to read young adult books and got serious about writing. J now writes full time, volunteers at the town library, helps to run a School of the Arts at her church, and sings in the church band. She enjoys good coffee—read: home roasted by her husband—crafts, baking, running a small essential oil business, and chasing after her children. You’ll rarely see J without a book in her hands, and that’s the way she’d like to keep it.

(author of THE BREEDING TREE)

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#TopTen Reasons My #Kids Hide in their Rooms!

And with teenagers, it ain't to play Hide-and-Seek...

Top 10 Reasons my kids hide in their rooms:

1. obviously to play on their devices - though they don't think watching videos and texting and social media is "playing" it totally IS!
2. to avoid chores or HW or general nagging
3. to hide activities I don't want to know about
4. to pretend they're not around, esp if they might be in trouble for something
5. to remove themselves from a sibling getting yelled at, don't bring me into this!
6. to sulk and recoop after a loss
7. to chill and relax
8. to watch their own shows on netflix when mom has the remote
9. to clean up - ha ha ha, just kidding, that never happens
10. to nap/sleep, this one is okay, teenagers need a lot of sleep!

They do spend a lot of time in their rooms, but we have our together time too - like movie nights, sporting events, most dinners, etc. And as they get bigger, they want more time to themselves. I get it. Sniff.

We were teenagers once too. I remember spending a lot of time in my room. I liked to read books and magazines, listen to music, make puzzles, write notes to my friends, experiment with makeup, daydream about boys, talk on the phone - remember that stuff?...Though the format and speed of things have changed, kids need their alone time to figure themselves out. We also need to monitor and limit their device time, like our parents did - but that's fodder for another post!

Got teenagers? Remember when you were that age? And we survived!

Happy Monday and have a great week!

Fake It Til You Make It!

One of the first bits and most important bits of advice in my early career came from a successful author who told me it had been the key to his success. He told me to “fake it til I made it.” Even from his first book, he never let himself get caught in the trap of believing he hadn’t earned the attention and readership yet. It was really great advice, and it kept me from devaluing my own work even during times of struggle.

However, what he didn’t realize was that he was giving me a mantra to get through every other day of my life, too.

Pulling my hair out? Of course not! I'm just really,
really happy that it's Monday. Riiiiiight.....

And it starts with each and every Monday morning. I wake up like I’m pretty sure most everyone else does – with a cold pit of existential dread in my belly and anger at the world for allowing Monday mornings to even be a thing – and then I start getting into character. It started out as a kind of game while I was putting on my make-up. With each bit I applied, I pretended I was putting on a mask that was happy and smiling and cheery (you know, me after like 5 cups of coffee). By the time I was finished with the transformation I found I was*gasp* actually looking forward to the day and anything it could bring. Sure, I still started out groaning and incoherent, but by the time I got to the office I was the happy morning person that everyone loves to hate. And I meant it!

After a while of such success with faking myself into making it, the process started even earlier in the morning for me. Now in my head I was becoming that TV character who wakes up with a stretch and a smile and perfect hair and eyeliner still intact. True, that only works until I see the mirror, but by that point I already feel better.

And, after all, isn’t feeling better the whole point? Here are some other ways I’ve tricked my brain into not cowering in the dark space between snoozes:

• Picking a goal that actually excites me to start on first in the morning.
• Forget worrying about the lengthy to-do list that I didn’t finish before bed. Instead, take stock of my accomplishments during the day and let myself feel some satisfaction for a job well done.
• I treat myself! I deserve a treat for getting out of bed, right? So I can look forward to whatever special diet-breaking treat I allow myself first thing in the morning. Here lately that’s been a Hansen Pomegranate Soda. Yum!

 What kinds of motivators do you use to help you fake it til you make it?

I don't need to clean my house

Welcome, welcome, welcome - S.K. Anthony!
The title of this post alone makes me feel even closer to her. So without more of my nonsense, here is S.K.'s guest post for Monday...

Let me tell you, I just hate cleaning . . . so I don't. Go ahead and judge me, I'll wait. 

*Files nails* 

Done? ;) Okay, so here goes: I hate the idea of "I have to clean" so I avoid it at all costs. Instead, I've brainwashed myself into thinking I've formed daily habits that—unless I stick to—I will gain ten pounds overnight. So far so good.

And I'm honest with myself. I know that being fully organized just isn't going to happen overnight. Come on, Ladies, that's unrealistic (unlike gaining a ton of weight overnight). But keeping up with a routine and being consistent is key to at least look like you have your . . . umm, "stuff" together. 

So, if you are trying to get into a cleaning habit but are struggling with the daily clutter, here are some of my tips:

* If you take something out, put it away! *STAT*

This is something that doesn't and shouldn't have to wait. Most importantly, get your kids and spouse into the same habit. Tell them it's way easier to do it right away than spending hours trying to put EVERYTHING away in one shot. Also, remind them that if you have to do it they might be murdered, so really? It's a "stay alive" habit and they need to get with it.

*Everyday, something needs to be tackled—ten minutes is all you need. Getting it ALL done in one day just screams FAILURE. Take one minute to make your bed, have your kids make theirs, the other nine minutes? Well, pick up clothes and/or toys from the floor one day, dust the next, vacuum, scrub your kitchen sink, etc. Small things that ultimately add up . . . and don't tell me you can't find ten minutes for these little things. You totally got it. I believe in you.

*Deal with your counters. 

This one takes more effort than I care to admit, but it could be simple . . . I think. First, let's begin with the kitchen counter—I don't want to overwhelm you. After dinner? Just wipe the thing down. WIPE IT! And show it who is boss! Once that's second nature to "what happens after dinner", move on to he bathroom counters too. What's a second quick wipe going to do to you? Kill you? No. No it won't. Pinky swear!

On that note . . .

*Umm, wash your dishes. I'll be honest, I don't always thrive here. And I know you're wondering about that overnight weight gain. Well, I keep it to—at most—three pounds when I don't do the dishes. How? I, umm, convince myself they need soaking and so that's kind of taking care of it. Other than that, all I can say is when you get up the next morning you will be so glad you didn't procrastinate on it. Loading & unloading your dishwasher and/or doing dishes by hand is easier for me when I think of it as "mommy break" . . . I shall think and meditate while it happens. If that fails, well, I make up a Cinderella-type story in my head as I play the victim :P

*Sort your mail daily. The first thing I do as I walk from the mail box and into the kitchen, is grab the spam mail & flyers and throw them out (yes, in the recycle bin. Don't stress out!). Then I put the rest of the stack down and let it rest until I'm making dinner . . . because that's how I role. But you have to come up with your own system on that. I have a couple small baskets (I'm obsessed with bins and baskets) so I sort them out into bills to pay, important paperwork that needs further filing, shred the bills already taken cared of, etc. 

So yes, I don't really clean. I just take care of these dreaded tasks quickly so I don't have to even think about them later. And they really only take a couple minutes! Don't put it off! But if you do . . . and you have unexpected visitors? Here's my BONUS TIP:

S. K. Anthony is a writer, a reader and a make-stuff-up-er who lives in New York with her husband and toddler twins. She is a wine connoisseur, which just really means she knows she loves it, and a caffeine addict. When she isn’t busy with her family, she finds herself being transported into the world of imagination. Well, either that or running away from spiders . . . she is convinced they are out to get her!

Stop and Smell the Christmas Trees!

My task list during the holiday season is much like anyone else - insane, and likely impossible to complete without breaking the space-time continuum. Somehow, though, I muddled through as always and ran smack into the post-holiday blahs during which I go into anxiety mode about plans and projects for the new year and then start to ignore my usual task list (which I'm pretty sure has acquired sentience and been adding it's own items just to see if I notice).

I guess it shouldn't have been any huge surprise when I came home this weekend in my typical tunnel vision haze. It was, however, for my poor dear husband who'd had Friday off work and was waiting for me to notice what any normal non-writer crazy lady should have noticed. He finally broke down Saturday night and asked:

Hubs: "Did you notice ANYTHING different about the living room?"
Me *popping my head out of my Snuggie reading fort*: "Huh?"
Hubs: "Um, the Christmas tree?"

That's when it hit me. Our Christmas tree, wreath, stockings... all of it was gone and neatly put away. Our teeny living room - which had just been over-crowded with Christmas decor - was suddenly half empty and I hadn't even noticed. I'd let myself get so focused on projects to get us through 2017 that I just completely stopped paying any attention to anything around me, and consequently overlooked a tremendously nice thing my husband had taken care of for me. (Yes, I'm a terrible wife!)

So my advice for this Monday morning is this:

No matter how much we think we have to prepare for tomorrow, we still need to stop and smell the Christmas trees before they're gone.


P.S. - This is not advocating anyone to come and rob me because you think I won't notice anything missing. Because I totally will. Eventually. Maybe. 

#Tips for Managing Monday

You all are in for a real treat as we kick off 2016 with a GUEST POST from our favorite HouseHUSBAND! MARK KOOPMANS! He's an international man of mystery - and we snagged him in between his travels. Take it away, Mark!

Aloha,

Thanks to Tara, Liz and Ashley for guest posting this week with the Really Real Housewives. (Hey, after me, this blog can only go upwards and onwards for 2016.)

I was a stay-at-home dad for eight years and while things have changed, Mondays were always the most challenging day of the week. Here’s some tips that worked for me, especially when I had three kids out of school:

• Field Trip Day: Once the boys were playing at the playground, I used the time to make plans for the rest of the week (and avoid stares from other moms who wondered who this male interloper was!)
• Grocery Shopping: A necessary evil that often turned into, “An extra field trip, kids!” especially when I had to save time.
• Monday Movie Nights: With the boys staying up later, the threat of pulling Movie nights were a wonderful deterrent to earlier-in-the-day bad behavior.

Mainly though, I used Mondays to prepare for the new week, and here’s one more vitally important thing: Flexibility. This is much needed after discovering the just-cleaned living room is now the new, slimy base of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. (Without flexibility, rolling into the fetal position for a quick sob can be very bad for the back.)

Mark Koopmans was born and raised in Dublin, Ireland. In 1989, he spent the next several years working in Holland, Spain, France and England. In 1994, he won his U.S. "Green Card," and is an American by choice since 2003. Koopmans began his writing career that same year with a feature for a regional magazine in California. Since then, he's worked as a staff writer for newspapers in Florida and Texas. Koopmans is also a proficient blogger and is working on his next book. He lives in Virginia, and is "Papa" to three active boys under the age of nine. He writes at night.

5 Little Tricks to Meet Monday

and Survive. . .Smile, Even.

Please welcome C. Lee McKenzie - guest posting all this week! She's got a clever cure for Making the Most of Mondays!

You've had a wonderful weekend. You were with friends or family and relaxing, maybe planning the holiday get-togethers. Then whammo! It's Monday. Just the thought of dragging your bones from the bed and off to work is making you think about spending money on Lottery Tickets! With millions you could retire! But the fact is your chances of winning those millions before the alarm stops ringing are nil. 

Up you go, but for help with that transition from a horizontal to a vertical Monday, read on. 

1. Have something fun planned with your family or friends for Wednesday. 

2. Write something sweet to yourself Sunday night and put it where you'll find it first thing Monday morning. "Dear Me. You are amazing.  Today's going to be the best day for you."

3. Save a huge treat for yourself to have later that day. Plan to buy a new something or other. Schedule a Monday massage in the late afternoon. Save the last chapter of that thriller for Monday at lunch. Choose a quick dinner--leftovers, take-out, or better yet, out-out. Let the restaurant do the dishes on Monday night. You can look forward to that from the minute you wake up.

4. Do a quick routine that refreshes you once you're out of bed: a stretch routine, meditation, warm bath or shower, freshly brewed tea or coffee or freshly squeezed juice or smoothie. 

5. Have something you love the taste of set aside just for Monday morning--that chocolate donut that's not good for you, but you can enjoy once in a while or the spinach omelet with your favorite cheese. Don't cut back on Monday mornings. 

C. Lee McKenzie

In Lee's writing, she takes on modern issues that today's teens face in their daily lives. Her first young adult novel, Sliding on the Edge, which dealt with cutting and suicide was published in 2009. Her second, titled The Princess of Las Pulgas, dealing with a family who loses everything and must rebuild their lives came out in 2010. Double Negative (2014) was her third young adult novel. Researching it turned her into a literacy advocate. Her fourth YA, Sudden Secrets came out in December 2014.

When she really wants to have fun, she writes middle grade books. Alligators Overhead was her first published book for readers age 8-12, and the sequel, The Great Time Lock Disaster, is now out.

Lee's website

Mortgage Straight Talk - Choosing a 15-yr or 30-yr term

HI EVERYONE!!! I’m Ashley, and I’ve been looking so forward to sharing this first post with you guys. This is a topic that is near and dear to my heart and it's a little bit long (in true soapbox fashion). But I promise it'll be worth it!

Here’s the scenario: Think back to your experience buying your first house, maybe even your second or third house. At any point during your purchasing experience, did the mortgage consultant or sales rep really give you the full picture of a 15-yr vs a 30-yr loan? OR give you the tools to make the analysis yourself? Chances are you, like most Americans embarking on purchasing their first or second home, never heard the difference between the two aside from the monthly bottom line, let alone the myriad reasons why one might be better for you than the other.

And that, my friends, burns my biscuits.

If you’ve heard much about them at all, you’ve probably heard the common wisdom that you can keep your payments flexible and lower by choosing a 30-yr and making extra principal payments each month to pay it off in 15 years. And if you’re planning on staying in the house for more than 10 years and having payment flexibility is a concern in your budget, this is a rock solid plan. HOWEVER, there are two big caveats that keep this from working for the majority of the population:

•        The average length of time homeowners stay in one house now is only 5-8 years, and
•        It takes a lot of discipline to keep ignoring the calls of life redirecting your extra cash to the mortgage when it isn’t required on the bill. You know what calls I mean.... We are waaaay to good at justifying purchases to ourselves, especially when it’s something for the household and not directly for us. That shiny new TV was for the family, not us, right? RIGHT? 

So what considerations do you really need to keep in mind when deciding if a 30-yr or 15-yr is right for you? I’m glad you asked! The following checklist assumes 100% financing since it’s the most common loan for first time homebuyers.

A 30-yr mortgage is probably right for you if:

• You can only afford the payment on a 30-yr for the loan amount you’re seeking.
• You plan to stay in the house for at least 10 years (even better if you can make the extra principal payments)
• You plan to invest the payment difference responsibly in retirement or other funds that will yield growth at least relative to the difference in the interest payments
• POSSIBLY for the income tax reduction. See the notes on Taxes below to help you weigh the impact of the added deduction.

A 15-yr mortgage is probably right for you if:

• You can afford the difference in payment easily – then take the 15 hands down. No contest!
• You only plan to be in the house 5-7 years. Even if you think there’s a chance you’ll have to put your house back on the market in that time. See the chart below for the evidence as to why a 15-yr knocks a 30-yr out of the water in the short term.
• You are close to retirement and foresee a need to reduce living expenses. Home equity lines of credit can be powerful financial tools in the case of emergency or illness, but they require equity.
• The interest rates are higher. When the rates go up, the benefit of a 15-yr over a 30 really explodes.

Taxes (AKA, payin’ the Man):

I’ve had the conversation with many friends who were convinced that they needed the higher interest for the income tax deduction come April 15^th.  After we did the math, that only turned out to be true for about half of them. If the higher interest will reduce your taxable income enough to lower your tax bracket, then this is probably a strong consideration for you. If not, you can estimate the value of the higher deduction to your tax savings as:

(Taxable Income2 x Tax Rate) – (Taxable Income1 x Tax Rate) = Tax Savings

In other words, if you make $75,000 a year in a 25% tax bracket with anticipated itemized deductions of $13,500 with a 30-yr loan or $12,000 with a 15-yr loan, your tax savings for paying $1,500 more a year in interest is only $375. Surprising, eh? And not in the awesome finding-money-in-the-laundry kind of way, either.

The Really Real Numbers - Finally!

WHEW! Time for a breather! If you’ve hung with me this long – you are a rock star. Finances are never fun reading, but our home is the biggest asset most of us have, so knowing how to get the most out of it is crucial to our family’s financial well-being. So, if you’re the finance-savvy rock star I think you are – this next part is for you! To play with the numbers and make them match your circumstances, download the full amortization schedules here for each of the scenarios demonstrated below.

Below is a summary of what to expect from the first 5 years of 3 different $150K mortgages:

• A standard 30-yr loan with no extra payments
• A 30-yr loan with extra principal payments (the total additional payment is the average of the principal payment cost over the 5 years)
• A standard 15-yr loan with no extra payments

The loans use the current rates listed on a national bank site as of 10/23/2015 and assume 0% down payments with a start date of Jan 1, 2016. Total Escrow (insurance/property taxes) + PMI has been estimated at $245. 

Terms: *Equity Earned = Original Loan amount less the Principal Balance After 5 Years

**Net Gain = Equity Earned less Total Interest Paid. Interest Paid represents the cost of the loan. The goal is to minimize the cost of the loan while maximizing Equity Earned.

Still hanging in there with me? Then you probably just noticed that Option A left you in not much better shape than having paid rent for 5 years. Granted, your sales price may be higher than what you paid 5 years ago, but in this buyer's market there are no guarantees. Then you get to add in the cost of any repairs you'll be required to do (that can include appliance and carpet replacement, roof repairs, costly structural issues, etc), the 6% broker's fee, and the other closing costs sellers are expected to pay in markets like we're in now. Even after paying down your mortgage nearly $15,000 in 5 years, you could still end up paying out of pocket to sell your house. And I can promise you that it really does happen. In fact, it happened to me just a few years ago. 

That was when I vowed that "With God as my witness, I will never go [uninformed] again!" And hopefully I can also use these experiences to help others make the best decision for them along the way.

Thanks for sticking out my first post with me, friends! I promise the next post will be more light-hearted ;-)  In the meantime, don't forget to download the amortization schedules tool for your own use!