The best time to start a #diet - part 1

You know DIET is a four-letter word.

that's diet, btw

It's so negative. This is what it means to me:

D - Deny
I - Ingesting
E - Every-
T - Thing I like!

I used to try fad diets. Some worked at first. But you know the story - once you see some results, you give yourself a reward. Then something comes up, like a vacation or Thanksgiving or the weekend! and the diet is out the window.

I don't diet anymore. I've been dieting all my life - never satisfied with my weight. Sound familiar? That's a problem in and of itself - a self-esteem problem that is shared by most women. With age, and child-bearing, I grew to accept my form. I maturely realized I wasn't going to exercise my butt off (ha ha). I chose to spend my valuable spare time on things that were most important to me, like family and writing.

I stayed relatively healthy and not too heavy. Then the Change hit. No one said anything about the 25 extra pounds that magically appear!! And in such a short time! I didn't change my eating habits or minimal exercise routine, but BAM! Here I am about to hit my max weight of dire consequences. This is unacceptable and I now have to do something drastic. But I won't call it a diet...

Time to UPGRADE MY LIFE!

I have four constant goals:

But these goals are wishy washy and vague, and easily ignored or appeased. "I drank three cups of coffee - that's mostly water" or "How many raspberries do you think are in a jelly donut? That counts." I groan at my own excuses!

So I am undergoing a lifestyle change. I have to be serious. I also have to be reasonable with the expectations I place on myself. But most of all, I have to have WILL POWER!

At least I'm starting this undertaking at the best time to start a change of eating habits - SPRING!

In Part 2, I'll talk more about my plan and why Spring is the best time to start it. I decided to go for it on Thursday 3/29, so I'll have a 2-week update on my progress as well... Wish me luck!

Do you have a max weight? Do you diet? How do you stay healthy?

Hope you're having a great start to this Stormy Spring!

This is Strength

A few months back, a neighbor of mine was talking about her job as a personal trainer. She said something I’ll never forget: Beauty is not a flat stomach. It’s not smooth skin or great hair or a perfect figure. Beauty is strength.

I’ve never considered myself a courageous person. I sit on the edge of fear most of the time. No scary movies, no haunted houses… even doing everyday things like driving down a busy road or walking to the park scares me. But courage, and strength, can manifest itself in many different ways.

I have no qualms about telling people exactly how much I weigh. (292.6, for curious minds.) I don’t worry about sharing my pant size. (22) I make jokes often about how I dye my hair blonde to hide the many (MANY) gray hairs that have popped up, starting at age 26. The reason? It took me a long time to understand it, but sharing those things help. Not just me, but so many others.

When I decided on healthier and happier habits, I noticed that I often got discouraged by weight loss stories. All I saw were numbers. “Go from a size 16 to a size 8!” “She lost over 50 pounds in 6 months!” Numbers were my enemy. Numbers do not a beauty make.

So my number (292.6) means nothing to me. My size (22)? Nothing. You know what means something?

My smile.

(Oh, there it is ;) )

My relationships.

My strength.

For those of you who’ve read my entire week, first, thank you. And second, find those things that bring you happiness, that bring you joy, and that keep you strong.


Hugs and Love,
Cassie Mae

Cassie Mae is the author of a few hundred… okay, maybe not that many… books. Some of which became popular for their quirky titles, characters, and stories. She likes writing about nerds, geeks, the awkward, the fluffy, the short, the shy, the loud, the fun.

Along with writing, Cassie likes to binge watch Once Upon A Time and The Flash. She can quote Harry Potter lines quick as a whip. And she likes kissing her hubby, but only if his facial hair is trimmed. She also likes cheesecake to a very obsessive degree.

You can stalk, talk, or send pictures of Luke Bryan to her on her Facebook page

Thanks again, Cassie for sharing your journey to happiness, joy, and strength! You're a beautiful example!!

This is Joy

Thank you to everyone who read my previous post, basically introducing my story to you :)

When I talk about happiness, I feel that the description is something felt deep within during moments that are lighthearted and fun. For example, happiness is losing that extra pound, getting that promotion, going on dates, or maybe getting some unexpected income. Life throws us a bone every now and again. It’s good to feel happiness.

But joy… I consider joy to be something that is much more valuable. It’s the quality that I fight for every day. I take comfort in the fact that joy does not require being happy one hundred percent of the time. Just as life throws us a bone, it also gives us challenges we are never ready for. To have something there to help us be happy in those times is what #projectgethappy is about.

After a steady five-pound-a-month weight loss, I stopped losing two months ago. At a standstill, I become frustrated, annoyed, angry even. But combined with all those emotions comes something even better—joy. Because I have been outright with my journey, candid about my weight, I have people to lean on and turn to for encouragement. Also, I’ve learned to lean on myself. Sure, I am at a standstill, but I am beautiful. I am strong. I’m all kinds of wonderful, really ;) These are things I never would’ve thought about myself before.

Joy is something that warms your soul when there is nothing else to keep it brightly lit. Joy is gaining a pound, but knowing how beautiful you still are. Joy is writing 10,000 words that your editor advises that you delete, and you do it knowing it’ll make the story better. Joy is getting fired and having someone to hold you while you worry about how to pay next month’s rent.
Hold onto your joy. It is the key ingredient to any weight loss journey.

Hugs and Love,
Cassie Mae

Cassie Mae is the author of a few hundred… okay, maybe not that many… books. Some of which became popular for their quirky titles, characters, and stories. She likes writing about nerds, geeks, the awkward, the fluffy, the short, the shy, the loud, the fun.

Along with writing, Cassie likes to binge watch Once Upon A Time and The Flash. She can quote Harry Potter lines quick as a whip. And she likes kissing her hubby, but only if his facial hair is trimmed. She also likes cheesecake to a very obsessive degree.

You can stalk, talk, or send pictures of Luke Bryan to her on her Facebook page

Bless Your Heart... For Real!

All Customer Service Employees need this book

Yes, I'm trying to stir the pot again.

I once had an interesting conversation that started with this prompt: “There is a vast difference between being 'nice' and being 'polite.’” A few people, and I have to believe that they are among those rarities who are actually nice all of the time (yes, they do exist but I am unfortunately not one of them), argued that there is no difference between the two words. For most of the discussion, however, I found that people do tend to notice distinct differences between these two words and what they meant to them.

I bring this up for two reasons:

1.  Being a word nerd, I’m fascinated by how two words meaning essentially the same thing conversationally (despite specific definitions) and used interchangeably so often can evolve to conjure such specific reactions, and 
2. I had a long phone call where I realized that the ‘polite’ person that I was talking to on the phone was not a ‘nice’ person at all. In fact, I was pretty sure that she was giving me the finger while she was saying, “Bless your heart,” safely from her end of the phone line. I got off the phone with this "customer service rep" feeling hollow, irritated, and condescended to, and eventually just angry. NOT good for the old mental/emotional well-being.

You probably grew up across the street from this lady

For those not familiar with southern sarcasm, ‘Bless your heart’ can sometimes be a meaningful expression of sympathy, but more often than not it’s a southern lady’s socially acceptable way of saying “Why the hell do you think I care?”

Now it's got me wondering about my own responses to people and feeling slightly guilty. You know what I mean... The phone rings at work and, blast that caller ID, it’s one of those people you'd rather give extraneous body parts than have to deal with. But, since you have a job to do for which you are being paid, on goes that plasticine smile with the glazed eyes as you say, “No, you’re no problem at all, really, how can I help you?” All the while your imagination is dreaming up scenarios in which it would be acceptable for you to scream “Go away already you horrible person!”

See? Polite, but not nice, and certainly not in keeping with my goal to remain positive. On Monday I talked about faking it til we make it as a way to trick ourselves into being more naturally optimistic. When I let myself hide behind the polite mask I'm doing the opposite - I'm allowing myself to be negative by justifying to myself that it's not *my* fault that so-and-so is a pain to deal with instead of just putting my big girl pants on and take some pride in a job well done even if it means a momentary irritation.

Now that I’ve given you the set up, what do you think? What do these two words mean to you, and do you feel affected differently by them?

Fake It Til You Make It!

One of the first bits and most important bits of advice in my early career came from a successful author who told me it had been the key to his success. He told me to “fake it til I made it.” Even from his first book, he never let himself get caught in the trap of believing he hadn’t earned the attention and readership yet. It was really great advice, and it kept me from devaluing my own work even during times of struggle.

However, what he didn’t realize was that he was giving me a mantra to get through every other day of my life, too.

Pulling my hair out? Of course not! I'm just really,
really happy that it's Monday. Riiiiiight.....

And it starts with each and every Monday morning. I wake up like I’m pretty sure most everyone else does – with a cold pit of existential dread in my belly and anger at the world for allowing Monday mornings to even be a thing – and then I start getting into character. It started out as a kind of game while I was putting on my make-up. With each bit I applied, I pretended I was putting on a mask that was happy and smiling and cheery (you know, me after like 5 cups of coffee). By the time I was finished with the transformation I found I was*gasp* actually looking forward to the day and anything it could bring. Sure, I still started out groaning and incoherent, but by the time I got to the office I was the happy morning person that everyone loves to hate. And I meant it!

After a while of such success with faking myself into making it, the process started even earlier in the morning for me. Now in my head I was becoming that TV character who wakes up with a stretch and a smile and perfect hair and eyeliner still intact. True, that only works until I see the mirror, but by that point I already feel better.

And, after all, isn’t feeling better the whole point? Here are some other ways I’ve tricked my brain into not cowering in the dark space between snoozes:

• Picking a goal that actually excites me to start on first in the morning.
• Forget worrying about the lengthy to-do list that I didn’t finish before bed. Instead, take stock of my accomplishments during the day and let myself feel some satisfaction for a job well done.
• I treat myself! I deserve a treat for getting out of bed, right? So I can look forward to whatever special diet-breaking treat I allow myself first thing in the morning. Here lately that’s been a Hansen Pomegranate Soda. Yum!

 What kinds of motivators do you use to help you fake it til you make it?

Good Habits - 21 Days to make or break, the #Truth

Some people like to start the new year with a new attitude - to be healthier or have a better outlook on life... But no matter when you choose to make a significant change, it's a tough thing to do!

We've heard this statement before that it takes 21 days to make a habit. So if you do a good thing (like exercise or drink water with your dinner) for 21 days in a row, it will become a habit. Easy, right? Well, it will become part of your routine. And if you feel better because of it, hopefully you'll stick with it and it will become part of your lifestyle.

The problem is, it doesn't work so well for breaking a habit. Trying NOT to do something for 21 days is not the same thing. It's much harder. It takes much more will power. AND even after staying away from a bad habit for years, one slip can cause it to return, very similar to an addiction.

So here I offer some helpful ways to break a bad habit:

• Pick one bad habit and concentrate on it.
• Be specific, have a plan, and write it down.
• Replace the bad behavior with a good one, especially when a craving to be bad strikes.
• Check in with yourself - have checkpoints or goal measurements, or even a chart just to check off that you did good today.
• Reward yourself with something special (NOT a cheat day to do your bad habit just this once - it defeats the purpose!)
• Don't be too hard on yourself if you do slip up - it happens, just keep trying!

Now I need to pick one for myself to work on... so many to choose from!

Have a great weekend, everyone!

(Research source: How Stuff Works)

Good Habits - Keeping track of the Yearlies

A new year means new beginnings for some. It also means we have to repeat the yearlies...

There's the yearly bills - Home Owner's dues, property taxes, income taxes, dog tags, license plates...

There's the yearly events and holidays - birthdays, anniversaries, sports seasons, fundraisers (yay Girl Scout Cookies! and my book events!)

There's the yearly maintenances - oil changes, carpet cleaning, spring cleaning, gardening/landscaping/pruning, etc

and
There's the yearly doctor visits - prodding, poking, squishing, rinsing-and-spitting, blinding, etc

I look forward to some of these yearlies (I like to purge and donate) and dread others (Didn't I just go to the doctor?). Each year my memory gets worse, so I keep track of my yearly events on my calendar. Bdays are easy and help me remember to get my boys' physicals for their sports. The doctors usually keep me in line with their reminders, but not always so looking back at my calendar helps (I think I'm due for a dental cleaning, ugh). I also have a budget so I know what's coming, but I have a bad habit of ignoring the big "surprises" until I get the invoice in the mail, not to mention, they always go up!

What yearlies do you like/dislike? How do you keep track?
Happy Muster-it-up for Monday!