How to Survive Motherhood

I hope you enjoyed peace, quiet, and adoration on Mother's Day!

But Mothers deserve so much more than just one day off - and probably don't even take the whole day off anyway. A Mother's job is 24-7.

Mothers have the biggest hearts, putting up with sass, cleaning up after messy families, cooking for unappreciative diners, and going above and beyond to make sure the family is happy and healthy, no matter the cost to herself.

So how do we do it? How do Mothers survive motherhood?

• Stay positive - a million things may go wrong, but experience tells us everything will work out, and the kids latch on to mom looking on the bright side
• Stay focused - it's easy to get sidetracked with details or things we forgot to get or do on our lengthy chore list. If you prioritize your list, the bigger things will be taken care of, and the rest can be done when there's time (ha ha) or can be moved up in the priority order as needed.
• Stay flexible - surprises and changes come along all the time--class picnic or baseball game rain-outs, sickness, and forgotten lunches or homework. Expect the unexpected and when it happens, it will be easier to deal with.
• Stay calm - Freaking out is contagious. When the kids see their mom is calm in a crazy situation, it helps them calm down too: Mom is a Superhero--she can handle ANYTHING!
• Stay true - Sometimes being a Mom is tough, like when we have to say "No" even when "everyone else is doing it." Stay true to your word, even if you get flack for it, your kids will turn out better and respect you...later!
• Stay fun - Moms are fun too. Be silly, be unpredictable, tell the kids funny stories about your youth, join them in the fort or for a mom and kids slumber party, let them help you bake...there's a time to be serious and there's a time to play. Enjoy it while it lasts!
• Stay yourself - we all make mistakes, but we're all awesome anyway. Admit the first, move on, and shine on. You are their idol for life.

It's all worth it!

Wishing you Flowers and Sunshine after a Fresh Spring Rain!

#MondayMusings - Living in the Moments

Today we welcome Kristen Kehoe to the House - she's got some common sense tips for happier living!

Hello ladies of The REALLY Real Housewives and everyone else! Thank you for having me.

Before with worry

Yes, captain. I suffer from what I’m starting to understand as the mom illness, AKA I have to do it all, be it all, know it all, and I better be efficient while I’m at it.

What does this mean? Well, it means I like to worry about anything. Everything. All of it. Why? Please see above for the aforementioned illness.

Honestly? I want to know that what I’m doing is enough—for my family, myself, my career…I also like to make lists ;) I’m organized in my crazy.

But, lovely people, in my thirty-two young years (seriously, I adore my thirties), through the people around me, experiences I have had and those I’ve observed, I’ve learned that worry is not the key to a good life. Living is.

What’s that, you say? What is this thing called living, and who has time for it? Trust me, I hear you.

We all have bills to pay, work to stress over and complete, housework to contend with, a spouse to communicate with, maybe even spend alone time with, and children to feed, scold, praise, feed, cuddle, nurture, educate, love, etc. We all have those things, whatever they are, that we do every day to make sure we can keep our lives functioning. But living isn’t just about those necessary things that keep us going, however much they consume us; it includes stopping, looking around, and being in this moment (even if this moment includes going insane from cabin fever while the school dares to cancel for ice and snow again. Don’t they know we just had winter break? Another game of Candy Land or Connect Four or, sweet baby jeebus, BARBIES, will kill me).

For me, living in these moments means turning my phone onto airplane mode, or Do Not Disturb, and resisting the urge to check my steps for the day, or my book rankings, or sales dashboard, or reading the latest blog post about finding more readers and greater success. It means resisting the urge to scroll through my Instagram feed and compare myself to every other crafting-DIY-CrossFit mom who has five times the number of children and projects as me, and ten percent less body-fat and wrinkles.

• Living means putting on rain boots and taking my puppy and daughter for a walk, even when she’s whining and the dog is chewing on her leash trying to walk herself, and I’m half-crazy by the end of those two miles.
• Living means accepting that my body is thirty-two, not seventeen, not twenty-five, and the marks and curves (fine, lumps) it bears are those of life, not just age.
• And living means looking at myself in the mirror instead of the Instagram filter, and knowing that happiness is mine for the taking—if I’m willing—and it is not dependent on flawless skin, great lashes, or smooth hair (read: everything I would have to purchase in order to have).

After letting go of worry

It’s not ground breaking, but if there is any advice that I might be qualified to give (and trust me, the jury is still out on that) it is that for a few moments a day, we have to stop, look away from the never-ending stack of “to-do” and “worry-about” and “status update,” and embrace the moment.

Kiss your cat, your kids, your dog, your partner, your spouse…heck, kiss your kindle and the book boyfriends that live in it and just live. We often look for happiness in those big moments—but life is made up of small moments, insignificant moments, that all paint that one chaotic and brilliant picture. So live today, right now, over your first or fifth cup of coffee. We can go back to worrying in just a minute.

Until next time.
xoxo

Kristen Kehoe is a wife, mother to a four-year-old girl and four-month-old puppy, teacher, romance author, and captain of the crazy train. Nice to meet you ;-)

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